help needed

[skinstealer]

[SUGAR_COOKIE]:

hello, i'm a weapon type looking to become softer. i don't know how else to put it, so sorry if it comes across weird.

my therapist tells me there's nothing wrong with being the way i am, and that i shouldn't try to make myself more "palatable" to others, but I also have a lot of issue with being covered in blades, so.

thoughts? weapon type input preferred but i'm open to hearing from others as well.

[Lilium Mortem]

[RADCAT_420]:
Sorry I'm not a weapon type, but I dable in the mystic. as well as beint super interested in meds. From what I understand, Weapon removal surgeries for Weapon types are pretty common. if ur having trouble with ur blades do you want to get rid of 'em?

[skinstealer]

[SUGAR_COOKIE]:

i put caps on them currently but it's still really unwieldy. i don't know how i feel about surgery, it feels...scary, and i've heard a lot of horror stories about the surgeries making things worse if you have them done by someone who doesn't entirely know what they're doing...and i don't exactly have a lot of money.

there's also some factors that i don't want to get into that would make getting a surgery like that complicated.

[Lilium Mortem]

[RADCAT_420]: understndable. maybe I need a different perspective. wht do you mean by 'soft', like what doues that meen to u, and y do you want it?

[victorianflorist]

[DAMASK_LAMENT]: Forgive my forwardness, but why do you feel the need to compensate for what you feel is a prickly appearance by adjusting your personality? You already seem quite pleasant from the way you phrase your text.

[DAMASK_LAMENT]: Will not those who have the capacity to appreciate your personality find you despite what you feel makes you offensive to be around?

[DAMASK_LAMENT]: Now if you are truly a reprehensible person, offensive in language and manner, then that is a different discussion that you must have with your therapist, but from your thread here I feel you must be anything but.

[skinstealer]

[SUGAR_COOKIE]:

sorry, haven't responded to this thread in a long time...

i've been doing a lot of thinking on this subject. i think what i meant by soft back then was that i wanted people to see me as approachable, but with time and a lot of thinking over these messages, i've realized that i don't have to angle for that as much as i thought i would.

i still feel sharp and prickly, admittedly. i have a lot of issues talking in person, and there's still...things about my position IRL that would make a pysical "softening" impossible, nor do i think that it'd be a good idea anymore. it's too risky and i don't want to give anyone else the impression that there's anything wrong with being a weapon type, just because i have weird fucked up brain things about it. i've been told that i am callous, as much as i try to curate an image of being gentle, it always feels out of reach...

i guess, a better question would be...

how does one deal with these kinds of thoughts, considering there's nothing actually """"wrong"""" with me in the first place...

[knux400]

[GENTLE_STAR]

I think it's less about the way you present yourself and more about finding the right people to present yourself to. I know it sounds cliche, but if you can find the right person to see past your physical appearance and appreciate you for who you are- not necessarily a partner, it could be just a friend or a group of friends- then it might lead to feeling more... fulfilled? I can't think of a better word.

I don't have any advice for actually finding those sorts of people, though. I wish I did. The best thing I can think of to do is to just... put yourself out there? Go to parties, events, get-togethers, whatever. Something outside your comfort zone, but not too far out. I was in a bad place for a while, and I met people who cared about me just by random happenstance. So I guess my advice would be to just let happenstance... happen?

As for actual practical advice, I am a weapon type, but not the kind you're thinking of. I've heard from others who have similar blades on them that lining the inside of the caps with something soft like foam or linen helps with the physical discomfort, and decorating the outside with charms or stickers helps with the mental discomfort. That's about all I have, sorry.

[skinstealer]

[SUGAR_COOKIE]:

i do have caps, but i haven't considered lining them... that's a nice idea. i don't know if i'm a charm or sticker kind of person, but it might be worth it to look into it.

...comfort zone...logically i know you're right. i'll have to think about it...

i wouldn't mind talking to another weapon type about this stuff honestly, even if the experience is different...