Let's Play Mewgenics: The Bad Care Run

[Shifter55]

Another day passes, and it's time to send out another set of cats to look for rare items, this time we have two interesting birth disorders - dwarfism and dyslexia, they alter things out of battle too!
Party Stats:
Mage Asshole
Minihook
Magic Missile
Latent Energy

Thief Little Madduh
Reduce
Backflip
Flip a Coin
Dwarfism
Strong Magnet
Leather Cap

Tank Fusilli
Landscape
Bylle Olfp
Mountain Form
Dyslexia
D6

Cleric Quoifeur
Rest
Holy Dash
Alms for the Poor

This party is a bit low on HP, and we didn't get a good starter active on Fusilli either, with their disorder changing the cost to 9. A D6 should allow us better chances at getting one we can convert to lower costs. Meanwhile Leather Cap and Strong Magnet make Madduh's coin collecting less risky.

Coming up on the miniboss, Dr. Beanies hits our cats with a beam! The damage is severe and most of our opening moves will be keeping our 3 CON cats from dying.

...I still don't understand the point of Speedy on bosses, as they have fixed turn order. At the very least Lucy can't reach us. Trying out the Brain Chip hat on Fusilli, we immediately watch the AI send her into range of a freeze... Asshole gets a hit on the Eagle and healed up by Quoifeur.

Unfortunately the Flamethrower hit earlier than expected, and we need to keep healing Asshole or he is going to burn up! Fusilli STILL is getting hit by the miniboss's spells, and our cleric was in range too, so we get Madduh to move Lucy with their magnet.


Finally, Fusilli gets some damage in, and immobilises the miniboss with repeated belly flops, but she and Quoifer still get frozen. Finally, Lucy moves into a position where we can backstab her, and that ends the fight. That's also enough of the Brain Chip for this adventure, instead we'll give Fusilli this random gun because we're going hard path and something horrible might turn up.

The shop has a leather mask, which we buy for our mage, and the rare candy gives us an interesting passive for theif: picking up all loot after a battle!
Party Changes:
Mage Asshole
+Leather Mask
+Rubber Cement
+Paw Missile

Thief Little Madduh
+Jar of Leeches
+Assassinate
+Loot Hoarder

Tank Fusilli
+Revolver
9 Attack damage!
+Csofnniou

Cleric Quoifeur
+Rain Hat
+Convert

And we're facing a Lucky Queen Hippo, which might be an issue given that buff can negate things like dodge chance and deal a surprising amount of damage in fights. Hopefully hitting her with Csofnniou will turn that damage back against her.

On round 4 the boss does enough damage to Fusilli that she goes down, due to Mountain Form we couldn't use Madduh's magnet to pull her out of there. Instead the battle now becomes avoiding the boss until she loses her brace. This is where all those backflips we've been doing with Madduh come into play! After a bit of rolling around the boss is defeated.

Now, we are going to try the Junkyard this time. Ideally we don't get wiped out...

Asshole and Madduh are doing quite well against the Jerkyls and Spiked Cats we encounter, with Backflip and Paw Missile keeping them out of the melee. But the real test is going to be the miniboss we are coming up to. Will it be another Trampy?
Party Changes:
Mage Asshole
-Leather Mask
+Muzzle

Thief Little Madduh
-Jar of Leechs
+Attractive Hair Clip
+D6

Tank Fusilli
-Revolver
7 Attack damage...
+Study
+Scrap Metal Armor
+Leather Mask
+Stem Cells

Cleric Quoifeur
+Revolver
+Jar of Leeches
+Blessing of Holy Fire

...And it's Trampy, thankfully with a less extreme buff. We bring Madduh into position and shrink him, giving a whopping 70% dodge chance. Sadly the boss instantly downs him with a critical spit, what the hell? Fusilli and Quoifeur punish him for this with stacks of Confusion and Burn from their abilties.

As the miniboss is going to be close to Asshole when he wakes up, we Swap him with this trashbag, getting out of there. A combo of another boosted melee and the Revolver significantly damages Trampy, and the combination of burn and bleed from the weather effect takes the miniboss out as the extra turns take their toll.
In the shop, we find a Crown of Feculence! While it's not immediately useful being able to make poop familiars will be handy with a certain disorder we could find later on...

One our first Hard Battle, we lose Madduh to a transformed Jerkyl! The multihit attack is no joke and I'm starting to think dodge isn't very reliable as a buff...

Thankfully, a stray cat sees this and volunteers to take his place! With surprisingly decent build too...
The second fight goes, better, but we only just make it, thanks to our Revolver. Asshole also Contracts Irritable Bowel Syndrome, which could work with the crown we bought, but the entire party is low on HP coming into the bossfight... we should have done the regular route and at least been able to come home.

Party Changes:
Mage Asshole
+Irritable Bowel Syndrome

Thief Little Madduh
KIA

Tank Fusilli
-Stem Cells

Cleric Quoifeur
+Wish

+Collarless Hat Kid
Interchange
Short Shot
Magic Seed

Thankfully the headless duo don't have dangerous buffs, but we need to focus on healing the party up and finishing the fight as fast as possible due to the weather inflicting Bleed.

Sadly they immediately home in our Cleric and that's the end for this party. Another failed adventure.