Crankshaft Rafflesian: We're Past the Tutorial Thank God!

[ThreadLurkingComorant]

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CuWqQzf6jearr5FMjEqFE89y335b7I_4YJyPXn_hRmo/edit?usp=sharing

The original short chapter for ya'll wanting more context. Or not, things will try to fill in major details regardless.



You are Lex. You're old enough to drink but still are afraid of the harder stuff. You invested in a stay at home job managing inventory for a experimental online bookstore service, and the mailman won't let you depression nap in peace. You quietly pray that he'll let you enjoy your Sunday but he keeps knocking on the door. Wait.



It's Sunday. Why is he delivering mail on a Sunday? Oh my god it keeps on going. After slamming for 20 minutes you should have figured he wouldn't cave. It probably isn't even the mailman actually. Shoot. You only get to swear once a day so you're saving it for a moment that matters. Learning to clean up your language to look proper used to be hard but people value when you say fuck more.



Getting out of bed was a bit of a loud fumble.
You lumber toward the door after putting on a jacket to downplay that you're still in your PJs. The knocking's died down, they probably heard you trip.



As you turn the knob open and pull the door just a tiny creek a arm slams through holding a letter right to your face. Looks like a govern hired construct. You practiced all of your life for this.

???: Alexandra Rambo, I have a crucial little message for you today.
Lex: You do? 
???: Yep. I'm here by the request of a Dorthy Coil to be her partner in a formal ranked duel. She was challenged by a Mr. Wallace J. G. who is quite aware of your condition and has agreed to majority cover material and medical fees should they come up. 

Dotty would never just pick a fight like that so it's gotta be big. Part of you feels a bit warm and fuzzy that she picked you over someone much more well-versed. Maybe. You should check.

Lex: Just curious but... was I her first choice?
???: Only one she asked for. Now I wanted to give you more time to prep by popping in at 2PM but you sure took your sweet time so now instead of a hour you got less than half.
Lex: Yeah.. that's on me there. It's not too far, right?
???: It's in the area, I'll cover transportation even though it's not my job but just this once because you seem like a good person from what your friend's said.
Now you really do feel fuzzy.



The envelop has a fancy little old time feeling wax seal, probably from some kind of nobleman type. There's a little figurine of a "paletero" tapped to the front. Weird but it makes a statement.

???: You're actually qualified to try a new supplement believe it or not! With your arm mostly recovered but not quite, we got a little something to give you back your strength for this duel, it's a high end mod.
Lex: Wait, really?I don't really need it-
???: Yes you do.  Now I know I'm supposed to be a neutral party in this and all but in the state you're in combined with your middling ranking as a duelist? You're at pretty high risk of getting seriously hurt.
Lex: Is it a quick install?
???: Yep, especially for folks of a more organic nature like yours. We can talk more on the way there about it but for now I need to know if you'll fight or not.
Lex: Yeah! I mean, of course right?
???: Heh, of course. Now I'd say change into something a little more dignified but I don't think you got the time so just put on some nice shoes and grab a big stick.

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"The invite should fill you in on the details."



You got your shoes on, a luxury you realize you should wear more often. In hindsight, it's a mystery how anyone gets around without them. Much to your dismay though you're fence and alley hopping since they couldn't park the transport by your place due to it's size. You also quickly remember that you're not good at long distance running and you could never outrun a giant cat or a movie slasher to save your own life. You make it into a familiar street, but find yourself not alone. There's a whole lot more red than usual.

You're also pretty sure that's your ride.



Lex: Wallace J. Geezer?
Geezer: You're right on time you know?
Lex: You're a asshole for not giving me a day advance! I'm in a cast!
Geezer: You friend's the one who insisted on having you as a second, all I did is offer accommodations. We'll hook you up with some mods to cover you.
Lex: Is she here? Like right now?
Geezer: Dotty? Yeah, she's on the bus waiting for you. Want me to tell her you're here?
Lex: Yeah... so why aren't we fighting right here? Street is pretty empty, slow traffic, could get it over with fast.
Geezer: I like to pick a nice looking location and this street doesn't do it for me. You read the details? by the way? We're doing Linner first.
Lex: I skimmed... Linner?
Geezer: Eating between Lunch and Dinner. If I'm gonna whomp on a couple of dorks I may as well make sure they aren't going home hungry, right? 
Lex: I mean really wanna punch you right now though. You got one of those faces.
Geezer: You like it? 
Lex: Nope, can't trust anyone with a smile like that. Head's got a big red bullseye though and I want to just throw things at it.
Geezer: You'd be surprised how much I get that actually. Honestly though I'd say big floppy ears are gonna be way more trouble for you down the line than a glowing target, from experience. 

You struggle to justify why Dotty agreed to this for anything besides free food.

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You ham it up.



Lex: Shut up, you can't bribe me with food until after 5. Let's get this over with right now.
Geezer: Did you just... rip off your own sling?
Lex: I don't need it.
Geezer: You're gonna get smacked once in the arm and cry. 
Lex: It's fine, fight me now.
Geezer: I'll feel bad, let me give you a gun or something.
Lex: No, everything about you screams cartoon devil and I don't trust like that. 
Geezer: It's a good way to keep people on their toes.
Lex: By looking blatantly evil? You got a big robot dog head and no eyes! That's chaotic neutral at best!



Geezer: If you wanna look big, dress like what scares the shit out of you right? 
Lex: Nobody's scared of primary colors.
Geezer: I am.
Lex: That's lame though.
Geezer: You think so?
Lex: I mean you're valid and I won't look down at you but red, blue, and yellow will never make anyone jump.
Geezer: Yeah, guess that's not wrong.
Dotty: It's really not, trust me on that.
Lex: Dotty! 



Dotty: Yo! You made it on time!
Lex: Yo! Explain why we're here!
Dotty: ....Old debt.
Lex: Another?
Dotty: Yeah... I got a good bunch of those to deal with still. 
Lex: Like, old debt or OLD debt?
Dotty: Like before I met you or your friends old.
Lex: Ah.... You know you never gotta right?
Dotty: Only feels right you know? Can we scoot inside to talk about it more? 
Lex: How about you let me clap this guy first and we do it over dinner.
Dotty: Linner.
Lex: No. 
Dotty: It's a valid meal.
Lex: Linner has no rights.
Dotty: I'm hungry and he's feeding us so Linner is real today. Come inside.
Lex: No, I refuse to accept this world.



Dotty: Get your flat cottontail ass in here.
Lex: No.
Dotty: Lex, I will put you and everything you love in a sarcophagus.
Lex: Good, I can finally move in with you.
Dotty: Oversaturated fuck.
Lex: Big talk for someone who can't see past 240p.

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Dotty: Low blow.
Lex: It's valid.
Dotty: It is and you're grounded.
Lex: How could you.
Dotty: I have to! You're punished!
Lex: With what?
Dotty: You have to come with me in this god awful bus! You in?
Lex: Heck yeah. Help me up.



Dotty: You looking for excuses to hold hands?
Lex: Little bit, can't help it!
Dotty: You're a hell of a deviant you know. Public hand holding?
Lex: I want them all to know.
Dotty: Sinful. 
Lex: Coward's talk.
Dotty: How could you tempt me into a display of affection! 
Lex: You love it!



Dotty: Maybe.
Lex: Only a maybe? You're going to hurt my feelings.
Dotty: Ah, that's dangerous you know?
Lex: Mmhmm. With talk like that I might only live a few days more at most.
Dotty: You got plans for the funeral?
Lex: Yep. I want my casket bared by clowns with torches in hand. When they bury me, I want them to unleash a horde of bees to prove how weak the flesh really is. Nobody will mourn peacefully.
Dotty: Pretty sure there's a fix for this.
Lex: What kind?
Dotty: The kind you hear in fairy tales.

Geezer interrupts. 

Geezer: You both gonna me making bedroom eyes at each other all day or are you gonna hurry up inside!



Dotty: I'm building mood.
Geezer: Gas is still running, you know that right?
Dotty: You can afford it.
Geezer: And Ya'll can scoot inside so you can be warm and gay in the backroom. 
Dotty: Bitch, you're gay too.
Geezer: Your mama is gay. 
Dotty: Good.

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Geezer climbs into the bus after you.

Geezer: Now that we got all the giggles out of our system, lets hurry inside and I'll debrief you on what's going on here. Mostly you in the Halloween colors honestly. You should fix your sling until we hook you up with some repairs.
Dotty: I kind of want to talk about it too. Feel it's important you know?

Geezer: 'Course, it's your matter just as much as mine here. Gonna be a bit of a trip as a note, don't be afraid to ask for stops and a bag if you feel sick. We'll eat halfway there.

The three of you get settled into the bus quickly, seated and ready to roll.



Geezer: So let me open up by saying I'm glad you both say fuck, makes me feel a lot more easy knowing we're all awful sailor mouths here. 
Lex: Little bit.
Dotty: Lex, You drop baby ass swears.
Lex: I'm saving my energy.
Geezer: Power move. 
Dotty: You're a knight from what I know right? Can't be doing anything else.



Geezer: Heh, yeah well...  let's focus on priorities for a sec. You wanna explain or should I?
Dotty: Think we should both really.
Lex: I just need someone to fill me in.
Dotty: So to sum it up, I got a lot of blanks in my memory and I got a reminder that I owe someone a duel. 
Geezer: My grandma to be exact, but she can't really travel this far anymore so she passed it onto me. And now I gotta kick the shit out of both of you because apparently there's some old promise involved here. 
Dotty: Yeah... and I'll be honest, while I really don't want to do this I also don't want it held against me down either. If I chicken out I'm going to be carrying someone else's weight for the rest of my life.



Lex: What?! No that's not fair!
Dotty: It's not! But I really need to get this over with.
Lex: It's a lot of horseshit and you know it.
Dotty: I know. Anytime some shit from however long ago I was shut down for comes up it's always a bit of a stinger you know? Like I'm just stuck with the debt of whoever used to have the same face as me at some point.
Lex: It's funeral fees. Funeral fees for a dead parent you never knew, never really wanted to know all that bad, and you're kinda just stuck with that.
Dotty: It's stupid. It's like being born in a jail with a ball and chain already installed.
Geezer: I can just go back and tell my grandma that we did have the fight you know.
Dotty: You think she'll just take your word for it though? If it really was planned for however long ago it was she was here I think she'd want proof.
Geezer: Yeah.... she wouldn't take it well if I faked it either. Probably would kick my ass.
Dotty: I'm not letting you get in trouble with your family, you didn't know any of this coming in here,
Geezer: I'm gonna be honest with you, doesn't feel good doing this either.



Dotty: Don't worry about it too much I guess.
Lex: I can sub in right? 
Dotty: You can if the fight drags on long enough that I'l allowed to... but...
Lex: I'll do it.
Geezer: No offense but you'd get whomped. I've seen your dueling record and I've never seen someone Mendoza line so hard.
Lex: I'll kick your grandma's ass.
Geezer: She has a gun.
Lex: I'll ask her to put down her gun and then kick her ass.
Geezer: She'll just shoot you and walk way if you try.
Dotty: I'm getting the vibe you're the much softer choice to fight here.
Geezer: Little bit.
Dotty: Not gonna lie though I wish she was here herself so I can punch her.
Geezer: Yeah... I mean I love her, don't get me wrong and all, but she kinda does owe you that if she wants this duel to happen.
Lex: Bring her over, call her a coward until she commits.
Geezer: Think doing that would just make her upset honest.... 
Lex: What, doesn't have thick skin or something?



Geezer: More that she'd be upset whatever friend promised to fight her isn't really there anymore. I dunno.
Dotty: Yeah I get that a ton from people. 
Geezer: Must be annoying right?
Dotty: No... it kinda just feels bad.

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Geezer: Well, now that we've established that we gotta do this one way or another, let me make something clear. I'm gonna make this legit with the least number of casualties. 
Dotty: I'm pretty sure at this scale of legal schlop this needs at least one casualty to end.
Geezer: Not of the match is settled by technicality. 
Dotty: That doesn't happen. Nobody rules for technicality outside of big viewership matches.
Geezer: That's what we're gonna do! .



Dotty: You're kidding. 
Lex: I high key don't mind dying in front of a crowd.
Dotty: Lex no.
Lex: I wanna scream real loud so the kids cry.
Dotty: Lex.
Lex: If it's a baby, bonus points so I can yell at the parents to get their kid out of the arena.
Dotty: What if they can't afford a babysitter?
Lex: Then their baby can wait in the lobby.
Geezer: Kid, that's like 3 hours these days. Nobody is gonna die if we do this right though.
Dotty: That sounds like match rigging.
Geezer: It's not match winning if it's a legit win by timer. If you got two bodies and time to know your opponent you can figure out a way to handle it.
Lex: Isn't it kind of unfair for it to be two on one?
Geezer: A duel can commence with absence of second if there's signed consent pre-match. I've seen your win loss records anyway so it balances out. Plus... we're gonna hook you up with some mods soon anyway.
Lex: We're going to a fancy doc?



Geezer: Nah but the place we're doing this at has a guy.
Lex: Where is it anyway?
Geezer: It's up north, neato little place I get the feeling you enjoy. You know the theme park? The super big one?
Lex: There's a few up there.
Geezer: The one with the Jalapeno rat.
Dotty: YO WHAT?
Lex: Sounds fake.
Geezer: If I'm gonna make you both pay for my grandma's old beef, I'm gonna compensate you both. Resort, week long. Time before and after the match. Both parks.
Dotty: YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.
Geezer: I got the hookup.
Dotty: God I can GUSH trivia on some of the shit that goes down there. You know about the hidden city? Or the supposed after hours wonders? Or all the haunted spots people threw ashes onto?
Lex: You gotta hook us up with that.
Geezer: Heh well... I can try but if you get the boot breaking something it's not on me.
Dotty: There's a hidden city of stray cats Lex. Lots of them and they're tiny. 
Lex: Please.
Geezer: I'll see what I can do. We're gonna stop for lunch first though, I got coupons.



Dotty: If you stop before we get to the toll both I will drop you onto the pavement
Geezer: I'm taking you to meet the real life monopoly man himself, all expenses paid. You kill me now and you'll never know where the frozen head is.
Dotty: ... I'm sorry.
Lex: ..Why is there a frozen head?
Dotty: You'll understand when you're older.
Lex: No, I wanna know why the most polarizingly beloved media empire in the world has a frozen head, and hidden cities, and tiny cats.
Geezer: We're there, can we all scoot inside before we go into this? I'm starved as shit. Now.

[ThreadLurkingComorant]

Geezer: Ah shoot.. Actually I gotta do one thing quick. Gotta do you a quick reading Lex.
Lex: I thought you were hungry?
Geezer: Damn hungry but this is standard and I don't wanna get my cards all gross on burger juice. Gotta do a reading.
Lex: Why?
Geezer: It'll help me know if you're as squishy as you look.. plus something is a bit off and I wanna investigate.
Lex: I mean... alright I guess. I'm not surprised you're into some witchy stuff.
Geezer: I'm not. Now catch, 5 second rule if you miss.



He flings a set of three cards from his sleeve tactically. You try to grab ahold of them.
Something caught you though. A voice rings through your head, almost transparent as you try to process your surroundings. You're a long way from Kansas.



"Lex?"
Lex: Yeah that's me...
"Did you fuck up."
Lex: I think I goofed... I think the world broke for a moment.
You're pretty far from where you were just a moment ago.
"You can hear me this time?"
Lex: I'm not even sure who you actually are..
"Call me Jam for now."
Lex: Why?
"It's a working name until we think of something better. And also it's what people used to call you on the dumb chatlogs we used to do."
Lex: Oh god you're one of my old forum friends aren't you?
Jam: Nope. I'm the part of you that's got your shit together. Hi.




Lex: You're me?
Jam: Almost. You think therefore I am. And I got all those old juicy details packed in my head that you're too nervous to admit outloud.
Lex: Prove it, coward.
Jam: Well... I know you once wiped your hands on someone's coat after eating hotwings. I know this is the third time you broke that exact same arm. I know you spend 3 months as a redhead in high school trying to get the attention of someone you liked.
Lex: It looked good.
Jam: It did! And I know...



Jam: You've always wanted someone to dip you like this.
Lex: Oh.... does this count?
Jam: No.
Lex: Damn.
Jam: And I can say fuck, you coward.
Lex: You caved in.
Jam: That doesn't make me any less powerful.
Lex: So... you really are me then huh?
Jam: Almost? I don't think I am but I've been there but also I think I might be real now? I'm not so sure on that though...
Lex: Right now you're real to me.
Jam: That means a lot you know? I get a little existential about this sort of thing sometimes... plenty of people don't like to acknoweldge it.
Lex: I mean... I don't know. You're in front of me right now, you give me some really good old friend vibes, and I rather not think I've actually just full on unreality'd out of existence?
Jam: Trust me, you're not the last one or I'd be feeling pretty crazy too.
Lex: It's good to hear it from someone who understands... even if it's sorta me but not really.
Jam: Of course, you deserve that much.



Lex: Yeah well...
Jam: Plus... think of it as an advance incase I go and embarass you.
Lex: Nothing you say is gonna embarass me.
Jam: No shame?
Lex: None.
Jam: Good... because I'm fumbling a bit.
Lex: Shut up, you're doing fine.
Jam: I mean uh... outside.
Lex: Where?
Jam: In the real world. They had to replace our sling again. I tripped.
Lex: Ah... Are you out there?
Jam: Yeah... I'm kind of a klutz turns out!
Lex: That's in character, they won't notice.
Jam: Dotty is comforting me. She packed us some stuff for the trip so we aren't in PJs for the first day. I think Geezer noticed I'm not you.
Lex: I'm sure it's fine. We'll just... have to figure out what this is first.
Jam: Can you take back the wheel? He's legit spooked. Like, garlic and religious texts spooked. I've never seen a grown ass man afraid he's fucked up this bad in my life.
Lex: Course. You alright yourself?



Jam: Yeah.. just talk to me more alright?
Lex: If you're still here later, of course.

[ThreadLurkingComorant]

Jam: I'm just gonna say goodbye quick, if you don't mind. I know she's your friend and she's taking care of us right now so...
Lex: Go for it! I mean she's yours too right?
Jam: Mm. I kinda want you to explaining it sometime. I'm a little too nervous about it myself. I'll be quick...
You try take a peek outside. You slowly make out what details you can.



Jam: Can you take one last look to see if it's all good?
Dotty: Yeah, mods look pretty alright. Don't fuss with them anymore.
Jam: Hard not to, it's like playing with a bandage.
Dotty: Lex. Please.
Jam: I'm kidding... I should go now though. Not for long
Dotty: We're in a moving vehicle.
Jam: It'll make sense in context.
Dotty: You tired?
Jam: Little bit. Send me off proper.
They leaned in toward Dotty's dangling horrible hair maw
Dotty: Lex?
Jam: Mmm?
Dotty: Lex no that kills people.
Oh shit.


"...We'e never actually kissed before, Jam."
".... But you're both dating right?"
"Yeah?"
"How?!"
"I mean yeah but... I didn't know if she did the kissing thing. She has no mouth."
"There's a perfectly good one there right?"
"Yeah but..."
"Wait does she not like it?"
"I... don't know?"
"Ah... I pricked myself."
Dotty: Lex are you okay? Lex please tell me you got a tetnus shot.
The mouth pulls away.
"I didn't."
"Oh my god I'm fucking sorry."
"I'm fine I just... Ah shoot what if this is weird for her."
"I didn't know I didn't even think about it shitshitshitshit."
Shit
Shit
Shit
SHit



You're not even sure who's thoughts are who anymore.
"Fuck, I didn't know.."
"She's not mad, I'm not mad, just relax."
"Shit."
"Give me the wheel. Can you do that?"
"I'm sorry...."
"Just... let me cover for you."
"You're all nervous about this too!"
"Please...?"
You are probably Lex. You're 22, you took a major that's kinda worthless in hindsight. Something weird is bleeding over. You can't if you're not you right now for sure.



Lex: Hey...
Dotty: Let me get a proper look at your face.
She pulls off your lens.
Dotty:... you okay?
Lex: I was but then I'm not now but I don't think I'm the reason why... I'm sorry I just made it kinda weird for you.
Dotty: I mean I was thinking about it for awhile, but that's kinda low priority right now. Lemme see your mouth.
Lex: It's fine. I feel sick though... like, in my head.
Dotty: Mm?
Lex: Like... I'm not upset but some other part of me feels bad... and I feel bad too. And I feel bad that they feel bad and I feel bad...
Dotty: Do you need some air.?

Lex: I wanna know I'm real I think.
Dotty: Of course you're real, why?

Lex: Like, I shouldn't doubt this right? I shouldn't? It's all kind of a little bitty irrational and it's batty in my brain that I might not be.
Dotty: Keep talking. Can you look over?
Lex: I don't wanna move. Am I me right now?
Dotty: Course. You don't think you are?
Lex: I really wanna. Just.. pull me back in.
Dotty: I'm right here, keep talking





Dotty: You feeling far away?
Lex: I'm feeling pretty far away.
Dotty: Is it nice?
Lex: Heh. No. But you being here is helping. I'm not crazy right?
Dotty: No?
Lex: Like, with everything. With the colors.. with the weird voices.. not knowing if I'm me and all.
Dotty: Never. Because I don't know nothing and that never made me crazy to you right?
Lex: Yeah... that's good.
Dotty: And you know something even if you don't know if you're you right now.
Lex: Mm... 
Dotty: We're almost there you know.. the theme park.
Lex: Are we?
Dotty: Yeah...
Lex: Then I'll see if I can hang on til we're there.

[ThreadLurkingComorant]

System check complete.
You're flopped over on a bed.



A film plays on the screen of a nearby tv.
The main character is a bird you're sure. It's like, a 3D cartoon or something. Like that movie with the green monster. It was probably expensive to make.
"Are you comfortable yet?"
"More pillows.... Are you allowed to like, show me this? It's still in theaters right?"
"This suite allows it, performance duelists are given priority access to the entire film catalogue.... assuming the embargo is over."
"For real? Nice.... More pillows."
"No issue-"
"No not there, lower. lower than that."
"Ah, no problem. Do you have history of leg related trauma?"
"Don't remember off the top of my head, why?"
"People who've had serious injuries sometimes like certain areas elevated."
"No, I just like it like this."
"Just to confirm, you are with Wallace Geezer's party yes?"
"Mmmhmm!"
"You seem young, are you a squire to one of the main duelists?"
"Uh... Dotty? Might be listed as Dorothy. I'm not that young. Ah, more pillows but like... stacked."
"Mm. The number of fractures you've had are absurdly high by civilian standards, so I figured you've been training under one of the two knights with you."
"Nah.... wait, two?"
"Dorothy."
"That's not a typo right?"
"Nope, although she hasn't taken a task under the title in decades until today. And just to confirm, you are... Alexandra?"
"You can call me Lex, it's easier. More pillows."
"I'm sorry, we actually can't spare anymore, we need to ration them out for other guests here."
"No worries, I'm kinda surprised you let me get away with this much."
"Can I get you anything else?"
"Yeah.. where's the rest of my stuff?"
"We put it in the shelves. We had to remove your coat and accessories to check your eye. We also left you supplies to deal with your dental overgrowth."
"Yeah I'm bad about gnawing."
"We insist you tame them before your duel. Clean presentation is valued quite a bit in duelists."
"Yeah, sorry about that."
"Also if you don't, your teeth may overgrow to the point of drilling into your brain."
"Is that true? Is that a real thing?"
"Yes. Anything else?"
"Uh... nah, I'm kinda just munchy right now but I dunno."
"We stocked the mini fridge with what sponsors allow."
"We got sponsors?"
"Yes."
"Are they good?"
"Off the record?"
"Yeah."
"No but they wanna get into this badly scene so they put good money on the match."
"I mean... I'll take it. Is Dotty okay?"
"She's finishing up with standard diagnostics, she'll join you soon."
"Cool, then I guess I'll bug you if I need more?"
"Someone will come in if you need assistance."

You lay in bed, your eye stings but you're not entirely sure what happened there. You blacked out on the bus over and are now in the comfort of a fancy hotel room.
You're not asleep but you pretend to be anyway.

[ThreadLurkingComorant]

Your friend has arrived.
Dotty: Lex, you awake?
Lex: No, I'm dead.
Dotty: You feeling better at all?
Lex: Yeah actually, your check up go okay?
Dotty: Mmhmm, great actually! They wanted me to remind you to work on your teeth though.
Lex: Are uh... they really that bad?
Dotty: I mean.... I don't mind them but you also don't want to get punched in the mouth like that.
Lex: Yeah, fair. Gotta say I'm surprised Geezer hooked us up with a good resort.
Dotty: Yeah uh, that wasn't him. They upgraded us because they dropped you on your face trying to carry you out. Pretty much everything covered so you don't sue.
Lex: Nice... wait...


You pull at the eyepatch you didn't quite notice until now.
Dotty: Please don't- oh god it's really bad....
Lex: I'm gonna do it.
Dotty: Ewww…. cover that up please...



Lex: Uh.... everything looks weird. Why you smiling?
Dotty: I don't have facial rigs Lex. I'm always smiling.
Lex: Are you sure...?
Dotty: It kinda looks like a frown from the right angle?
Lex: Aaaaah... I can't see like, a big chunk. It's kind of a nasty blind spot.
Dotty: Yeah... they'll hook you up with a replacement before the match.
Lex: Wait is it gone?! Where did they drop me?!
Dotty: In a bush and it's fractured.
Lex: Wait how-
Dotty: Feral possums.
Lex: That's like a freak accident right?
Dotty: Actually common around here. The whole park slash resort area is kinda just bombarded with them. They get rid of rodents so it helps.
Lex: I'm a rodent.
Dotty: You're a lagomorph, there's a difference. You get a look at our view yet?
Lex: No... should I?
Dotty: Yeah!
You both scoot over.



Lex: Shoot... are we right in between all of it?
Dotty: Geezer and I milked as much as we can out of it... so as long as they fix your eye I think we're more than good yeah?
Lex: You know I should have a little more uh.. integrity?
Dotty: That's the right word.
Lex: But... I don't wanna mess with lawyers anyway.



You are in the central resort of Capital Farms Resort.

Lex: You think we got time to mess around at the local shops?
Dotty: I know I can't really stop you so... 
Lex: So we're down?
Dotty: Yeah.

[ThreadLurkingComorant]

Lex: Really is nice out there. Lets go soon. Pretty hungry, didn't eat before we left.
Dotty: The doctor use any sort of anesthetics? Might be hard on you.
Lex: I... don't remember? Still missing an eye so I dunno. Outer casing got shattered but the lens made it out okay so it's easy to fix.
Dotty: That's good. You gonna go for anything new?
Lex: Nah, I can't pull off heterochromia.
Dotty: I think you'd look good.
Lex: More like a stray cat.
Dotty: Like a cat cat or a tiny cat or a cat person or.....
Lex: First one. Second one doesn't even got eyes.
Dotty: .....You sure?
Lex: They're eyespots. Meant to scare predators or something, least that's what makes sense. Had a friend who thought they were some kind of marketing ploy though.
Dotty: Weird.
Lex: Yeah. Said some kind of giant mountain sized cat grandma was creating them as a publicity stunt.
Dotty: You mean Kurt from when you were in college right?
Lex: Yeah, you remember him?
Dotty: Yeah, the hippie goth. I've talked to him a few times.
Lex: If he heard you call him that he'd feel stronger.
Dotty: I mean... that's what he was.
Lex: Yeah... wonder if he's still doing expedition.
Dotty: It's been more than two years so... probably not? Sure you could look him up.
Lex: Yeah. You got any old friends you haven't seen in awhile.
Dotty: I mean.... mostly because I don't want them to see me when I don't remember them.
Lex: Ah... yeah I made this into a bummer.
Dotty: You'll forget about it when we're out there.
Lex: Yeah?
Dotty: Yeah, you'll buy a giant glowstick or something and then you'll be lost in the lights.
Lex: Look, I don't shame you.
Dotty: I got nothing to shame.
Lex: I'll remind you when we're waiting in line for a fried gummy bear.
Dotty: Look.
Lex: Exactly.
Dotty: Now I really wanna go. You gonna be okay after everything today?
Lex: Yep, feeling good as can be.
Dotty: Just make sure to eyepatch up before you go alright? Empty sockets freak people out.
Lex: Yeah, I'll make sure to handle that. You brought cash?

Geezer: You don't gotta worry about that, got you both covered.

You both turn over to see the dog headed bastard at the doorway. You fish around your pockets for your eyepatch.


Dotty: Hoe.
Geezer: Yep, here with gift cards for all.... some restrictions apply. Don't uh, try spending these on a 300 dollar custom robe or something because they'll scream at you.
Dotty: How much?
Geezer: Enough hopefully, don't know if you two are heading out just now. Kinda cold so bring a jacket if you can. Play it safe too, people are shifty at night even at a family friendly theme park.
Lex: You sound like a mom.
Geezer: Never.
Lex: Like a bathrobe mom who watches crank news at 9 drinking wine.
Geezer: That's only a half truth. For real though, there's some wild stuff going on.
Lex: I mean it's tourists trying to milk their last hours.
Geezer: Nah like, weird stuff. Cowboy stuff.
Dotty: What's so bad about cowboys?
Lex: Yeah no what? That sounds cool.
Geezer: No like.. they're not normal cowboys.
Lex: Are they like monster cowboys or hot cowboys or....
Geezer: Well for one those things can overlap and-
Dotty: Cowboys can't be hot.
Geezer: That's objectively wrong, but let me finish.
Lex: Gotcha.
Dotty: Mm.



Geezer: There's a bunch of cowboys running around the parks but... they aren't part of the staff. They aren't a group of tourists. They just... roam. Awful bunch. Dress up in these big potato sack costumes with their hats and they they turn out to be these cosmic flesh abominations.
Dotty: Sounds fake.
Geezer: I'm serious, you see a cute small looking cowboy mascot you bail and call security.
Dotty: Shouldn't I intervene?
Geezer: I mean if you want to you can but you gotta go out in uniform.
Dotty: Yeah.... nah not today. So what are they?



Geezer: Awful. Shapeshifters and envoys of the end. Park security is monitoring for them but they're trying not to cause a fuss. Grotesque little rejected angels that got left on our little rock in the ocean. They aren't even native to the area so.. I guess they're a invasive species huh? Technically catagorized as a pest since they're small and easy to deal with but if they gather that's a issue.
Lex: I mean if they're small they should be easy to deal with right?
Geezer: You'd think but they're manipulative runts. All angels are.
Lex: You... you don't mean figuratively?
Dotty: Fill me in.
Geezer: Bad. Will literally unperson you if you die. But they're like babies so they can only really get you in a group.
Dotty: Okay yeah, no, fuck that.
Geezer: You're better off avoiding for now. If you see a big one, just bail. Get out as fast as possible, call security. They're dressed to blend but if you go to a shop owner they'll make the call quickly.
Dotty: And they're bad enough that you gotta warn us?
Geezer: Yeah. You're a knight Dotty so you're qualified for this but uh... if you do handle it quietly. A panic looks bad.
Dotty: I mean that's easy. 

You've found your eyepatch, you fuss to put it back on.


Geezer: The good news is the park's got a lot of feral possums to deal with most of the small ones so you're unlikely to have to worry much but once they reach over 2 feet tall it's a problem.
Lex: Is... is that like... another problem or....
Geezer: Nah, owners take care of them because they keep rodents from swarming after dark. It's a feature.
Dotty: Retroactively.
Geezer: Yeah. Just stay safe, you gotta be good for the fight this week.
Dotty: So uh.. are you gonna fight us both alone when it comes in?
Geezer: I mean I'll have a registered partner but they won't do shit so yeah. Have fun until then though.
Dotty: Mm.
Lex: 'Course.

[A_Mi_Manera]

You've fumbled your way out of the hotel, eyepatch and coat and all sorted together roughly with your friend by your side. 



Dotty: So... you want to talk a bit more about earlier?
Lex: Ah you mean... I'm really sorry if that was weird at all.
Dotty: Not at all! Just thinking about everything. Tons happened today really fast.
Lex: I mean.. if you don't mind too much I wanna go somewhere a little low traffic for this.
Dotty: Nobody's paying attention.
Lex: No but... I wanna set a mood for this.
Dotty: Like that over there?

There's a set piece, an perspective based optical illusion replicating the set of an old fantasy film from decades ago you're sure you've seen before. They're popular among people who like taking fancy vacation photos.



Lex: Yeah, that'll do. 
Dotty: You seen this movie?
Lex: Mm? Maybe. Uhhh, the one about the queen?    
Dotty: Princess but technically she would be? She was monarch and she *was* married. 
Lex: Weird. Marketing?
Dotty: Absolutely. Don't want kids worried power will make them old and wrinkly. 
Lex: Huh.. kind of pretty to look at.
Dotty: So... fake though. There's another set behind it.
Lex: The buildings behind the moon sure are uncanny?
Dotty: Yeah... 
Lex: But... I kind of like it? One of those eldritch things you stare at and it's almost pretty... like... can I tell you some dorky stuff quick?
Dotty: Go ahead, that's why we're here and not getting you that giant glow stick right?
Lex: Well... I mean I'll get to uh....
Dotty: To the stuff from earlier?
Lex: It's relevant to it I guess. So you know I used to do a lot of witching?
Dotty: I mean I had your old outfit for it saved away liked you asked. Brought it because I didn't have anything else for you and I figured you'd be running too late to pack proper.
Lex: Yeah well... used to be some comforting stuff really. Didn't have too many close friends growing up or do good in school or anything so being good at something that felt personal like that got me through stuff..
Dotty: You didn't seem that lonely when we met.
Lex: Ehh well... I wasn't good with keeping contact with any of those friends. Used to everything like that being temporary, even as a kid. Sometimes I wanted to just cut any losses and run into the sunset until I ran into something that'd stick you know?
Dotty: Where'd you go?
Lex: I mean this is goofy but there used to be these tall fields in my old town... and they'd go into the horizon. Nothing at the end. Sometimes I'd wonder if I'd find some pretty warm place at the other end where the people never leave. Maybe become a hero, maybe live a life of quiet with a few good folks, maybe even find the devil at the end and live hapilly ever after.
Dotty: Why the devil?
Lex: When you're a dumb teen the devil is either the end of the world or some cute shithead with wings and a tie.
Dotty: You're saying you used to be one of those?
Lex: It told you it'd be dorky!
Dotty: It is! You still uh...

She pauses for a moment.

Dotty: You worried at all that we're going to drift?
Lex: God I hope not but I'm a nervous wreck about the idea sometimes.. I think this is different but... I get scared you know? 

She offers her hand. You grab onto it.



Dotty: So you used to do magic?
Lex: Yeah, I was a bit of a lonely kid so you messed with that. Messed with things you shouldn't, messed with things that end with getting hurt more than often.
Dotty: So uh... 
Lex: So I gave it up I guess... used to be big into forging decks and filling books with new spells and uh... sometimes stuff got weird.
Dotty: Weird like...?
Lex: Embarrassing weird. Weird stuff that led to a lot of bad dreams and being scared of the dark and taking to voices in my head til they became real I guess. Wasn't good for me really. One of those voices came back though. Like a second me who has their stuff together better than I do. Smarter, braver, knew how to do the things I wanted to do better than I did. You met them today though, met them proper.
Dotty: Uhh.... when?
Lex: Like... that wasn't me when... it's like... another voice. Like when we.. you know, leaned in like that and... I mean... I'm sorry if that was weird.



She starts laughing. 

Dotty: Are you kidding?! I'm glad you did! 
Lex: Really? I mean... I liked it but...
Dotty: We're dating! I want you to do stuff like that! I mean.... I didn't expect you to go for it the way you did, the second mouth's meant for shredding robots apart so.... It's brave, sweet, maybe just the right kind of crazy. 
Lex: Yeah? I mean... It wasn't me though so uh.. I mean I really did want to! Like, I've thought about it!
Dotty: Then... why don't you do it yourself?
Lex: ...Are you sure? Like really? Right now?
Dotty: I'm giving you all night to figure out how you want to do it but... right now's not bad. 
Lex: And if I don't make it happen?
Dotty: Then we try again tomorrow. It's not that bad when you know someone's willing to risk their face like that.
Lex: I've thought about it a few times before that. Someone else just had to make it happen.
Dotty: Yeah well, that's the first proper kiss I can remember. It's a big moment.
Lex: Let me just psyche myself up a bit. I want to keep tonight going good.
Dotty: Like I said, take your time. just you, me the three lost folks passing by, and some old movie set backgrounds.

There's clearly someone you forgot to count in the background.




Dotty: That wasn't there right?
Lex: Could be a local lizard?
Dotty: That's not what lizards look like around here. It's got a hat.
Lex: Yeah that's... someone's pet probably. 
Dotty: That kind of looks like a cowboy hat doesn't it?
Lex: I mean you're right. That set's not to scale s it's probably small.
Dotty: I think it's still like a good 12 feet tall. It could probably drop someone.
Lex: It's kind of cute. 
Dotty: Cowboys can't be cute.
Lex:  I wanna fight it.
Dotty: No.

[A_Mi_Manera]

The lizard seemingly heard you because it approaches. It leaps and splats into the concrete with a ricochet through its body, sprinting back into place in a spring. 

Dotty: Call security, it's not a prop.

Lex: You go call security, I'm gonna keep it busy. 

Dotty: What? No!

Lex: No what?

Dotty: Thing gives some bad vibes and you're gonna get bit. 

Lex: I'm gonna fight it. 

Dotty: Don't fight random animals! That shit spreads infection!

Lex: I got my shots. Infection can't spread if we take it down here.



Dotty: Lex no I'm immune please stop-

You make direct eye contact with it. 

Lex: You. Me. In the octagon. 1v1, No breaks. Tap out or Pass out. 

Dotty: Lex that's illegal. 

Lex: Nah. 

You reach down to pick it up, it snarls at you the entire time but doesn't seem to act on anything.



Lex: It's fine. We'll take this back to Geezer and then goof off for the rest of the night. 

Dotty: You really think it'll hold still the whole time?

Lex: I mean.. it's fine right now? We'll manage. He said they're only a issue in big numbers right? It's two to one. Pretty chill little bastard. 

It starts to wriggle and squeal.

Dotty: It's not gonna stay still the entire way. Give it to me.

Lex: I can carry it, just help me calm it down.



You feel the sky coming down on you. Everything is fragmented. 

Dotty: Put it down!

You try to release but you can't control anything. You're frozen in place as you watch everything fall apart.

Lex: I can't move! I don't know what to do!

You clench your teeth and close your eyes, you don't feel entirely like you. The world reshapes like clay being clenched. You try your best not to scream... you're pretty sure you can hear your friend screaming pretty hard though.

Your existence feels like sand castles melted on the beach and made anew.



Your body starts to meld back together into a cold fleshy mesh. You feel weirdly weighty, like crawling out from a pool.

The world has flipped.

"Lex, what the fuck are you doing!? Back off!" 

You're conscious again. The lizard you're holding feels 7 feet tall. There's yelling. It's your friend right? Sounds a bit different but the tone's right. 

"Bitch!"



That's Dotty. You open your eyes. You look up. You've made a huge mistake.

Lex: Is that the lizard?

Dotty: Yes!

You are at point blank glazing range. You cannot dodge. If you try to back off you will get grabbed.  You're going to get decked into the concrete. 

You've been in scenarios like this plenty of times. If you flinch you lose.

You brace more than you've ever braced in any duel you've done before. This loops in your brain. Bait, fold, break. This is all happening in a flash but in your head it's spread frame by frame.



 It's ready to swing.

It comes toward you.

You reach your arm out.



You're slammed full force.

You take the blow directly. 

You've been hit harder than any construct has ever slammed you.

It's a miracle you're still thinking. Plasma drips from your gums.




You've managed to latch on. You crash an elbow into its neck and yank its other arm til the socket is on fire, all your muscle and weight in one motion.



This is the longest landing you've ever had to make. You're taking this to the ground.

[ಠ_ಠ]

..dam

[A_Mi_Manera]

You crash the lizard man into the ground, elbow against its throat. You press down to cut off as much of its air as you can, you need to finish the fight but it's hard in this position without a free arm, and it squirms too much to quite give in.

Lex: Dotty!

Without any sort of hesitation, she starts zooming in. Her leg pulls back. She prepares to slam the thing full force. You're a little too close for your liking. Oh god what if she just hits you in the crossfire!



Lex: Dotty no!

Dotty: If you move I'm gonna hit you! Don't fucking do it!
Lex: A-
Dotty: No!



She pinpoints her hit perfectly and slams the poor lizard. All the strange and otherworldly vibes fluctuating around you crash down. You feel yourself quickly reform to your old state as you watch the poor beast turn into its feeble form. It flies through the air.



It crumbles.
Lex: Oh my god! You launched that thing holy shit!
Dotty: Yeah.... I think we got it super good.
Lex: Is it gonna be okay?
Dotty: Dunno, hit it point bank.
Lex: Ohmygod- we did it!

You turn toward your friend and slam into her for a hug.

Dotty: You got lucky you know?

She returns it.



Dotty: I don't want you picking fights like that again. You hurt?
Lex: Nothing that won't be better in the morning, went by fast.
Dotty: Course it did, fights like those get decided by a few hits..... gotta say the way you just went for the pin like that. I don't think it was expecting you to take a hook to the face like that. 
Lex: I've been practicing you know? Plus it wasn't all that strong. Big but like... hollow muscle almost. 
Dotty: Really?  Huh.... You know you did pretty good though. We're gonna get scolded but... we did pretty good.


Lex: Think so?
Dotty: Course. Just be careful, I mean it.
Lex: Yeah... I'll let you handle things next time.


Lex: We should take it back though, Geezer would wanna know what it's about.
Dotty: You think the hotel is gonna want us bringing it in?
Lex: I mean... the fact that they told him means that if you can explain what we're doing we should be good right? The park wants these things out, betcha they eat all the feral possums rolling about. 
Dotty: They're more like ferrets but point's there. You gonna be good to haul that thing back? 
Lex: Easy.

You wrap it in your coat and drag it back to the hotel with you. Geezer knows what to do with it. Hopefully.


You scoot on over fast to check things out proper. It's alive but it doesn't seem like it'll be waking up anytime soon. It leaves a bit of a drooling mess. 



Dotty looks at you.
Dotty: You sure you don't want me doing this? Like... shit's kinda gross looking.
Lex: It's cute! In like, the way one of those metal little furry bird things are.
Dotty:... Which?
Lex: They like... talk and learn to say things they hear?
Dotty: Sounds like a baby.
Lex: Better than a baby. I'll show you some time, they're neat. People do horrifying mods on them.
Dotty: No!
Lex: I mean they're just toys don't worry about it like that. Aww this is kinda gross actually, one sec...

You bundle the lizard in your coat. 
Dotty: You're gonna need that washed.
Lex: I'm sure the park is gonna compensate us if we complain loud enough right?
Dotty: If Geezer did yeah. Let's see what he can do.

You both start running toward the hotel on the resort.

[A_Mi_Manera]

You both make it over quickly. You realize carrying it in your jacket may be less than sanitary so you bundle it in bandages left from its transformation earlier. You both make it back to your hotel floor in record time and knock on the door to Geezer's room, connected right to yours. 

Lex: Geezer!  Geezer we need you quick!

Geezer could be heard grumbling inside.

Dotty: Geezer you coward!

A sigh and a bit of clumsy walking coming toward you pulls in from the other side of the door. 

Geezer: Give me a sec, I was awful comfortable just now. In my bathrobe, nobody else around?

Lex: Nope.

Geezer: You give me gremlin energies. Not the kind on planes either, I wanna hear from Dotty there if that's alright.

Dotty: Nobody will see you in your jammies! Get out here!



Geezer pokes his head through. 

Geezer: Aw jeez what did you bring me? You... that's not a Pardner is it?



Dotty: Well...

Lex: It got weird and shifty, I think I became a slug, and we beat it into the concrete.

Geezer: ...Both of ya'll come right in, we need to talk about this proper. This is big and worrying.



You and Dotty flop it onto the bed, Geezer assures you it's probably safe to leave it there for now. Three people would overpower it easy if it tried something.

Geezer: Thing is big, both of ya'll really gazed into the abyss a little huh? Did it do the thing where everything changes?

Dotty: Mm.

Lex: I didn't have bones Geezer, what the fuck.

Geezer: Yeah uh... sorry about that. So these things tap into other timelines and project them onto everyone in radius. This one is unusually big so its radius probably hit both of you at once huh? For now it looks drained though, you both hit it awfully hard. Won't die so that's good. Sucker is protected you know? Killing a pardner is a 20k fine without a permit.

Dotty looks over at you.

Lex: Well.. I mean it didn't die right? So we're good?

Geezer: For now. It's got a nasty aura, angel in origin. Probably some sort of failed vessel that got wiped before it could be fully turned.

Dotty: Uh... like one of those angels? Big otherworldly hell beast?

Geezer: Yeah. I'll compensate ya both for your work but... this thing could be hinting at a out of your league threat and I don't know if you should stick around any further for this. 

Dotty: With all due respect, I was built to deal with angels. Early models like me were designed to do serious damage. If you need help keeping people in the park safe, I can do that.

Geezer: Ehhh.... I rather everyone evacuate but the owners would wanna do it quietly to avoid a hit to their rep. Capital Park Resort is a hell of a mess. Honestly out best bet is to funnel them toward a quiet zone where people aren't active enough to suspect stuff and deal with them there.

Dotty: I can do that if you can hook me up with the tools we'd need.

Geezer: 'Course, I can talk the park into compensating you too. 

Lex: I want in too, I'm not gonna sit by on this.

Geezer: With all due respect, you're a amateur duelist. I don't wanna put you at risk over this.



He touches the lizard with the tip of his finger. A little energy is projected from his hand discharged.



The world inverts.

Dotty: Ugh... Geezer why?



Lex:... It did the thing again?

Geezer: It's otherworldly stuff. Unless you know how to interact with this in and out, you can die. They're a pest species but that doesn't mean you can't get hurt awful bad.

Dotty:... you didn't change at all though. It transformed us both while we were exposed to... whatever this all is. What's up with that?



Geezer: Interacting with angels costs you a lot. This ain't my first body, can't say for sure it'd be my last if this ends up bigger than we go in expecting. This isn't dueling for sport, this is real combat and you're playing with your lives.

Lex: .....

Geezer: You still wanna do this?



Lex: I mean... I don't wanna be left behind, I wanna be there if something goes wrong you know? I don't got a lot of friends so uh... I dunno. 

Dotty: I'm gonna be safe.

Lex: I don't wanna leave that all up to fate you know? I wanna be there too.

Geezer sits in thought for a moment.

Geezer: I'm gonna propose something then...

Lex: Yeah?

Geezer: I'm gonna give you a reading of sorts, a real legit life changing one. If I like what I see, you can stick around but... I'm not taking weenies with me. If you're fucked, you're fucked. Get a good reading though and you're in the hunt but... this sort of shit does stuff to your brain. Know that.

[A_Mi_Manera]

Geezer: So I'm gonna do a reading with my deck proper, you might have some potential I spotted earlier. Any radiation from that lizard's weird uh... space and time messing Pardner nonsense should be gone by now. I'm gonna pull out of you the card that holds your potential.

Lex: With all due respect and stuff... I tackled down that pardner fine.

Dotty: She did actually. She's a more than alright fighter when it comes down to it. She should come with us.

Geezer: She finish the fight?

Dotty: Um.....

Lex: Dotty knocked it out.

Geezer: Then we're doing this. You ever done one of these before?

Lex: Yeah, I had a paranormal phase that lasted until the end of college.

Geezer: Cool, cool. You never did something you shouldn't have right? The world knows and remembers your mistakes.

Lex: Define that.

Geezer: Laying curses on others, crushing scraps for meal, that sort of thing?

Lex: Eww no, I just wanted to meet a nice shade or a otherworlder and hang out.
Geezer: ....Why?

Lex: I was lonely and a kid, shit doesn't make sense back then. You kinda pray some weird magical dork will take you to a place where you feel important one way or another. 

Geezer: The other side isn't all that great but you make some good friends there. God I gotta catch up with some folks....

Dotty: So you both aren't implying the things you are right?

Geezer: Huh?

Dotty: Like, you're talking about magic and other worlds... most of that's fake or just theory right? That's not what we're talking about here?

Geezer: That's exactly what we're talking. Otherworld magic, summoning ghosts, dealing with critters that shouldn't exist. That pardner you brought in, the big lizard? They're supposed to be way smaller and way less formed than that in a healthy environment. Someone made a big boo boo. Speaking of......

He looks at you with concern.

Lex: Is everything okay?

Geezer: So earlier I noticed you weren't exactly uh... you. I pulled out the deck because I wanted to gauge you and... you got someone else in there don't you? You got a proxy.

Lex: Uh......

Geezer: You didn't personify it right? Moment you treat it like someone else, it becomes someone else. You don't want your soul to find a separate sentience like that. That's bad for stuff.

You try to find a excuse but can't get it past your throat.

Geezer: What'd you name it? 

Lex: They already got a name actually-



Geezer: Yeah no, you're gonna have to confront it. You fuck it up, you don't got a chance against what we're facing. Handling one pardner? No biggie for anyone brave or scrappy enough. A bunch of these are bad business. I'm gonna do something to help you fix it. You ready?

Lex: ....Yeah.



Mist seeps from the ground, wrapping around you until it swallows you whole.

You find yourself in a familiar place.



Lex: I remember this.

You sure do, remember going out here with Dotty?

Lex: Mmhmm. What about it?

I liked that. You kept thinking about trying to hold her hand that night and then you didn't so I had to intervene. You didn't even notice it until she commented! 

Lex: I was nervous!

Really? You got no fear tackling someone bigger than you but hand holding does you in? So many times you could have died! I'm here too, I don't wanna die because you did something dumb you know.

Lex: I'm sorry! Uh, Jam right?

Yeah. You had a weird witch phase. I'm here to remind you that I guess.

Lex: Yeah. So uh.... why are you showing me this?

Setting the mood. This seems good right? A place for out fight?

Lex: Our fight?!

Yeah, our fight. You have to duel me. I want a nice backdrop for it.... This looks neat...



Lex: I don't wanna go that far back..... God I looked so gross in college.

How did that resolve? That day as a whole?

Lex: I don't remember. God I miss Kurt, we could talk stupid for hours. 

Where'd he go?

Lex: Government job, hoping it would get him some work in engineering or something. Haven't heard from him since, wonder if he remembers me at all. 

I'm sure he does. How abouuuut this then?

You're taken back to the arcade at the mall near your house. 



Lex: I like that. That's not the real thing right? 

All in your head, don't worry about breaking things.

Lex: I want that. Pick that one.

You will break things.

[A_Mi_Manera]

You're dressed in the clothes you wore during the summer after your graduation. 

God you looked like a dork back then.

You really do, it captured you at the time though.

In front of you is a opponent.

One who's got all your skills but twice the confidence.

Lex: Oh my god, don't you start! Out of my thoughts!

Jam: It's true isn't it? I mean you took 4 years to kiss your girlfriend!

Lex: 3 and 10 months! We kissed before!

Jam: On the cheek!

Lex: Her mouth is a sticker on her face.

Jam: Just because you're wet bread about a few sharp teeth doesn't mean you shouldn't try at least once!

Lex: I mean... she's self conscious about it so...

Jam: You don't think she might be a little less knowing you went for it?

Lex: You went for it... I just kinda.... 

Jam: Just kinda?

Lex: I guess I was worried it'd be too much so.... she never asked before...

Jam: Talk about it! Just ask her! She likes you! You like her!

Lex: I mean I know! It's dumb as hell. 

Jam: I'm gonna kick your ass if you keep being shy.

Lex: I thought I'm you were gonna kick my ass right now?

Jam: This could be the ass kicking, you're tired right? You just fought a dude, why would I go and have you smacked down again? We're gonna resolve some issues and-

Lex: Are you giving me therapy?



Jam: Yeah actually, you up for that?

Lex: Oh my god....

Jam: Come on, you got this.

Lex:.... Okay. But I wanna play a game after.

Jam: Earn that game then. Where do you wanna start?

Lex: Uh.... being born.

Jam: I wasn't there for that so I can't do a thing.

Lex: Dang, you wanna sit for this?

Jam: Yeah, find a spot.

[A_Mi_Manera]

You find yourself in a familiar large couch, accommodating for larger folks who come from overseas. This is the office of your old shrink from high school. God he was clueless. Why this place? You slump and sink into the couch with a lazy posture.



Lex: This isn't what I had in mind when I said find a spot. 

Jam: It made the most sense. Therapy.

Lex: I didn't exactly like this place.

Jam: I couldn't remember any other offices. So.....

Jam makes their face clear to see.

Jam: We can't start with your actual birth because I wasn't there.

Lex: Worth a shot.

Jam: And I assume nothing exciting happened there either.

Lex: Neither of my parents showed up.

Jam: That's super fake. 

Lex: Yeah well.... hey I got a question before we keep going.

Jam: Alright.

Lex: You're supposed to be part of me right?

Jam: The confident part.

Lex: You look super different from me, why?

Jam: I'm a abstract version of it. It's weird, don't worry about it.

Lex: But like, you REALLY don't look like me.

Jam: It's fine. 

Lex: You're okay with how you are though right?

Jam: I'll be honest it's not the form I would've picked for myself, you drew the Aeon though so your brain put me together from what you pictured that to be like. Should've gotten a cool card like Death or Alchemy. 

Lex: Can I like... re-roll you? If you're my inner confidence then shouldn't you change to match how I am today?

Jam: Maybe? You're way braver than you were in high school. Like, a shit ton actually.

Lex: You think so? 

Jam: Yeah, absolutely. Still can use some work but you sure got plenty to work with.

Lex: So like.... Geezer.

Jam: Yeah, he's looking to see your 'potential' which I guess he wants to see from me.

Lex: Right.

Jam: You could strike me down and I'd go back to a normal proxy so you could have that. Get some kind of power right?

Lex: That feels wrong.

Jam: I don't wanna do that either so yeah I agree. 

Lex: What should we do?

Jam: I could talk to him maybe. I can do it but... he probably wants you to have the power under your belt.

Lex: He doesn't have to know it's not me.

Jam: I mean I am you.

Lex: I think you're you, and just because you used to be me doesn't make that true anymore.

Jam: What exactly are you going at?

Lex: I think at this point you're your own person too, you got rights to say that. I couldn't kiss Dotty, I couldn't talk to myself like this so... you're you. Don't talk about us like we're pieces of one person.

Jam: Technically-

Lex: I'm giving you therapy now, technically no. 

Jam: I guess I got issues thinking of myself as me huh?

Lex: You are you. 

Jam: Right.... I'm gonna linger on that a bit but.... we should handle the Geezer situation first.

Lex: You can take the wheel right? You did that yesterday.

Jam: Yesterday? It's already past midnight.

Lex: Yeah, long day huh?

Jam: Super long, jeez. Yeah I'll take the wheel.

Lex: Don't get me in trouble. Don't do anything that'd get you and me killed.

Jam: It's no issue-

Lex: You took control for a couple of hours and busted my eye don't even start.

Jam: You mean our eye?

Lex: No, my eye..... that's sometimes yours too. 

Jam: I promise I'll be good this time.



Lex: Please do.

The mental lair around you starts to faze out. You feel your state in a bit of a twilight zone. You're pretty sure you're not you right now. 

Absolutely not.

You're free falling mentally.

You feel the sensation of reality wrap around your fingers. You're waking up.

You are currently: Jam. 

[A_Mi_Manera]

You can make out voices as you slowly gain consciousness. You're very sore from all day being one event after another.

Dotty: She's been standing there like that for so long. Bugs me a bit.

Geezer: She's fine. Probably.

Dotty: Probably?!

Geezer: If she messed with proxies since high school she has years of baggage to deal with. 

Dotty: So....

Geezer: So it might take awhile for her to win. I mean, I wanna believe she will but you know. Things happen.

Dotty: What happens if she loses?

Geezer: I dunno, I'm still not sure I'm the original me after I done and fucked but those were under way worse circumstances. 

Dotty: That's a mood... but also kind of worrying? She's not gonna die if she loses right?

Geezer: I can tell when someone's got a nightmare tier proxy like that and she doesn't have that. Worst case scenario? She gets locked out of whatever potential to project a proxy she had left and we bench her for this cowboy lizard adventure.

Dotty: Those got a proper name right?

Geezer: Yep.

Dotty: You wanna say it?

Geezer: Pardners.

Dotty: No for real, what are they called?

Geezer: I just told you, Pardners.

Dotty: Is.... is that really it? Why?

Geezer: Because at some point we called them Yeehaws and that seemed to piss them off.

Oh my god they won't shut up, maybe you should prompt something. You feel good enough to now.

Jam: Dotty? 



Dotty: Oh shoot, are you done?

Jam: Yeah.. um... it was a bit rough honestly. 

Geezer: Fighting your actual inner demons would do that. 

Jam: Can we talk privately? Dotty?

Jam, what are you gonna do?

Tell her the truth Lex. She already kinda knows about it and I'm not gonna have her out of the loop.

Geezer: Hold up there, I gotta know what you saw. 

Jam: Can we give it like ten minutes? I'm tired, had a hell of a long day. 

Geezer: No can do, I gotta make sure nothing screwy happened during any of that. What did you see? 

Dotty: Geezer, we should actually let her rest. She's pretty roughed up from everything that's gone on today.

Jam: Yeah, please? Promise I'll tell you after I got a good rest.

Geezer: Dotty, I'm not... entirely sure this is your friend.

You make sad eyes at Dotty. 



Jam: Let me talk to her please? I got something important to say. Just us. Like, no intrusions. 

Geezer: Dotty, something's off. Don't

Dotty: I know my own friend Geezer, just give us five to talk.

Geezer continues to look at you with suspicion.

Geezer: Don't let her run off yeah?

Dotty: She won't run on me, please stop.



Jam:  Look Geezer, I don't know what kind of trouble you ran into but relax, just give me a minute yeah? I'm tired. I'll tell you everything when I'm done.

Oh my god don't smirk at him he hates it.

He already knows, Lex.

Geezer: You step out of line, I will chase you down. Take ten minutes. If I hear Dotty scream, you're done.