-( T e t h e r e d )-

[SHIVERS]

-( T e t h e r e d )-
#03: Splinter
CW: Blood, implied nudity, issues with eating, dysphoria, dissociation, panic attack

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The eyes of the body opened.

Its chest rose and fell.

Tether stared at the underside of the top bunk.

Fatigue.
Why does it still feel tired?
It just slept.
For hours and hours.



The body's stomach growled.

Right.
I have to feed this.

Again.



Tether willed the body to climb out of bed.

Nothing ever satisfies this.

The body took shaky steps over to the sink.

Ungrateful.

Tether pulled the cabinet open, being careful not to knock off the cloth covering the mirror as they retrieved their toothbrush.

Vile.

It spit and rinsed.

A leech.

Tether wiped the body's mouth, putting away the toothbrush.

Consuming me.

Yesterday's clothes were slipped on.
Tether tried their best not to see.

Trapped inside a parasite.

They retrieved their keys and phone.

Controlling my attention.

The dorm door shut behind it.

Controlling me.

It stepped into the elevator.
Tether watched the numbers change.

With pain and discomfort.

The doors opened.

I want out.

Tether walked into the dorm dining hall.
Things were quiet, only a few early risers having breakfast at the cheap booths.

They made their way to the start of the serving line, ignoring the menu sign.
The person working the line jutted their head back a little upon noticing the body.
"What'll ya have? Today we-"
"Anything edible."

They shot Tether a glare.
"Well, good morning to you, too."

The body's eyebrows raised as food was tossed onto a tray and handed to them.
It stood still as they walked off into the kitchen.

...What just happened?
They continued down the line, grabbing random items, nearly forgetting a drink in the process.
Doesn't matter.

Once they left the line, Tether found their way to a booth at the very back, on a sort of balcony overlooking the main hall of the dorm.
Surveying the room as they sat down, they easily spotted a table of three several booths away attempting to covertly watch them. The trio averted their gaze when Tether glanced in their direction.

Of course.
More fear.
Or disgust.

They glanced away, focusing on the food on their tray.

I don't like this body, either.
But you wouldn't know that.

Reluctantly, they started eating, but found difficulty.
The body's hands were shaking, food falling off their fork.

What's wrong with you?

They set the fork down, watching the trembling hand.

...Fear?
Is it fear?



I can't tell.

I don't care.
Nothing is wrong. 
It shouldn't matter if they're staring.
They aren't going to be violent, and that's the only case where it would make any difference.

So calm down already.

They picked up their drink and turned the cap, only for it to pop off violently and spill on Tether's clothes.

You miserable--

They could feel the others watching as they hastily dried their shirt and pajama pants as best they could with a napkin.

Tether stood up, grabbed their tray and drink, and hurried for the exit.

Fine.

They picked up one of the foam boxes nearby and scraped food into it before setting the dirty tray on the counter.

I'm not playing along.
If you won't let me feed you, then I'll just wait.
I'm not trying again until you calm down.

The body stepped back into the elevator.

You can starve until then.

Tether shortly reached their dorm room and tossed the body onto their bed.

Thunder rumbled, drawing them to lift their head towards the window.
Heavy, grey clouds filled the sky, though it wasn't raining.
Strong winds tugged them along.

They laid the body's head back down and rolled it onto its side, ignoring its stomach growling.





























A cacophony of chimes and bells sounded, seizing Tether from sleep.
They grasped for their phone, eventually pulling it off the bedside table, where it had sat since last night.


...'Schedule app, automatic reminder.'
First class in an hour.


Biology.

...Wonderful.




They rolled the body back over.
















It feels like this skin is crawling.

...Sweat... I think.



Tether sat up.



I have to wash the body again.

A claw gripped the side of the bed.

Why does this require constant maintenance?

They dragged the body out of bed and retrieved a caddy with various cheap-looking soaps.

I don't want to think about it anymore.

They slipped flip-flops on, grabbed a set of clean clothes and a towel, and left into the dorm hall.

I hate this.

The hall felt shorter than usual as they trudged towards the bathroom.

Why again

One hand clenched as the other pushed through the door.

I don't want to see any more of it than I already have to.

I don't want to see any of it at all.

Once in a stall, shaky claws started pulling off their clothes.

I don't want to feel it.
I don't want any of it.

They stepped into the shower.


Don't think.

They could hardly get it to turn on the handles, tremors only growing worse.




Don't think anymore.





I'm not in this body.







I'm nowhere.










Nothing is happening.









Nothing is happening.








I'm not here.




















Tether found themself on the stall's bench outside the shower.
The body was panting, feeling lightheaded.
Its fur was still damp, but it sported clean clothes now.

Done. 
Think I'm done.


Class.

Back in their dorm, they checked their phone.



Seven- They slipped on a jacket and snagged their keys mid-motion of exiting the dorm.
The body flew down the stairs and out of the building, nearly knocking over another student who gasped in surprise.
Tether slowed to a brisk walk after that, not bothering to look back at them.

They tried to keep the head forward, but couldn't help noticing heads turning to look at them.


They shifted their sight upward instead.


The clouds were darker, appearing dense, full.



Tether's vision blurred, and they shook the body's head.
Focus. Calm down. 
What could possibly be wrong with you this time?
It was a shower, calm down. 
Do one thing correctly, please.






They sat down in the back row. 

A full-body, life-size anatomical model loomed next to them.
They hadn't noticed before they took a seat.
Its plastic organs were half-out, put up on display for all to see.
It stared at them with hollow eyes.



Tether had seen those same eyes before.

Several times.







I feel sick
The body's eyes darted around the room, witnessing passing glances in their direction.

Everyone's already sitting.
Getting up would draw more attention.

It's too late.
Settle down.

I'm not here.
Remember that

They focused back on the professor.




Is he talking?
I can't parse what he's saying.

I can't think

Other students pulled out laptops and paper.




Tether realized they'd left their notebook back at


















Chairs scooted back as everyone got up to leave.

Over.

How--
why didn't-Don't care.
Back to the room.

Sleep.

They got up, lagging behind the rest.

The professor cut them off on the way to the door.

The body stood still.

"Hey, you're Tether, right?"

Eyes drew up from the floor to meet the ruffneck's, making several stops along the way.

"Yes."
"Well, it's great to meet you.
You already know, but I'm                 "

Tether stared.

"Listen, would you mind waiting here a little while?
I really                    you s          ons, and I h                                         int                      ."













The body sat stiff in the seat.
The lab was empty.






No
not back

I can't 

do it anymore
I cant exist in this


I want out

They scrunched down, curling inward.

need out
please

please



Claws squeezed tight at the body's face.


Tether whimpered.


out 
out 
out 
out- 
They looked around frantically, searching for help, 
only to once again meet eyes with the anatomy model
OUT 
OUT 
OUT 
OUT 
PLEASE 
OUT 
OUT
ANYTHING-

The body heaved, then collapsed, face smacking against the tile with a dull thud.



Moments later, the ruffneck professor entered the lab with an amerveille in tow.
"So, Tether, I wanted--oh, no--"
He hurried over, gently shaking the body.
Getting no response, he picked it up as his colleague pulled out their phone.

The professor carried the body out, and the amerveille followed, dialing an emergency line.











The lab grew quiet.














Faint rainfall gradually overtook the relative silence of the lab.











In the back, 
something twitches.


Two plastic eyes close, 
then open themselves.