Discord
02-10-2026, 07:20 AM
IMPLOSION
AKA: The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known Post-Escaping The Mass
INTRODUCTION
![[Image: intro.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/intro.png)
[image description: a tall cartoon cat, known as a TCP, made out of slime and waving at the camera.]
hello to folks reading this both new and old to our situation- we're Mortis Velasquez, a plural person and one of the co-founders of the forums you're looking at as we speak. since this is going to be linked on socials and might be the first time people have engaged with our work, i'll try to keep the first part brief.
as of this post we are 29 years old, and have been an artist posting on the internet since we were 16. our first interactive project, Tiny Cat People: Void Session, is where we really got our start. it was hosted on TGchan and it was kind of. a point of stress.
...it still is. please do not ask us about that without us talking about it already lol.
with that project came the community and team us and our wonderful husband and co-founder Comorant brought together- Homebrew Deviants. we had been working on the universe of Morbit together since we were 13 year old roleplayers on Scratch, always hoping that someday we could make our characters and ideas into something other people could experience.
and now people do! and have for the past ten years, alongside a pile of really awesome friends both on HD staff and in the community itself. and for how much we've done re: worldbuilding and narrative projects, it's not bad for a decade.
it hasn't been easy, though. 2025 was our first real return to public posting after years of debilitating PTSD over social media and being a public figure under surveillance and exacerbated by life situation after life situation after life situation-
everything kind of congealed.
we knew ourselves as 100+ system members, which is a lot of guys. people never really got to know everyone, we never really got it all down, not in a way the people around us (or even ourselves) could even learn. as pressure was put on us from external factors, we found ourselves increasingly hard to tell who was who, and not in a good way.
we felt like we had lost our identity entirely. for months, particularly during a 6 month period of homelessness, we felt like we had become nothing but a mass of body parts and fragments, all lumped together in some kind of jellied Mass. existing in that state felt forced, like pressure outside of ourselves kept us
and of course, it couldn't hold. as we began to settle into our new permanent living situation, we got immediately and increasingly sick as parts began to crawl out of the mass, establishing themselves as individuals. made of the same components, the same chunks of organs, memories, etc- but largely put together "different".
due to how volatile it felt, how fast it onset, the only term that felt right was The Implosion.
what with everyone's memories, feelings, and associations being a patchwork disaster, we had to scramble to figure out who was who, how people felt about our life, each other, our friends and loved ones, our work- everything.
existential crisis doesn't really cover it.
it's been over a year since the Implosion, and we're still fucked up over it. social pressure to not have such a drastic change be so public- especially when a specific guy in here was known as the "face" and no longer is Despite The Fact We Keep Getting Called Him Anyway!!!!- kept us from really opening up.
what if people refused to learn the new roster?
what if people thought "eh, too complicated!"
what if people treated us worse than they did before?
would we even be able to exist in this new state as a known presence?
last summer, we started being a known presence again.
it went well. even with some pretty rough spots, it became clear that people did in fact want us around, and to experience our work- to get to know us. we ended up developing a lot stronger bonds with our friends, and getting a broader, more stable support network.
and yet we still struggled! even now, most people who we're most close to don't know who the hell is who outside of a few faces, which is the exact thing we want to avoid! god forbid, barely ANYONE knows outside of that immediate circle to begin with!
but then we came up with an idea.
in a lot of structured groups, especially things like group art therapy, participants are given a simple exercise with simple tools to help introduce themselves. we kept thinking too broadly- while everyone here has some kind of "form"/sona/whatever the hell you want to call it, the idea of explaining those is daunting and freaks some of us out. besides, stuff like second life avatars are a lot harder to pin down for 40 bespoke guys. it's too much pressure to get graphics and models and etc for!
but what if we were to give everyone the same basic tools in Second Life- the Basic Typeless TCP avatar pack, vanilla, no addons- and tell them to make some kind of self representation with that? everyone would be on the same playing field, and if asked to do a little writeup of their introduction and why they chose what they did...well, that'd be a pretty good baseline! and it'd be easy enough for new brainguys, too.
but, that's not a full picture, is it? that kind of thing takes time and self discovery, and never really ends as a process. how could we emulate that?
the nice benefit of Second Life is that avatars take on new parts and traits and pieces over time. you can put them together and adjust piecemeal, and our avatar systems we've designed have been optimized for that in particular.
why not go through the kits one at a time and let people choose what to add? what sort of things they want to try, like adding a new bit of clay or accent to their art therapy starting point? and, of course, they get to run around SL in that, or make art, renders, etc-
a way to be known. no one more important than anybody else.
we managed to get all of the starting avatars done up and rendered last night in 6 hours. this first post will introduce you to our system as it stands now, complete with the avatars we made. here we go.
LEVEL 1: BASIC BEGINNINGS
going in alphabetical order. let's go. assume everyone here is some weird degree of queer/genderfluid man unless otherwise specified.
![[Image: atlas-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/atlas-1-1.png)
[image description: a soft looking blue TCP, stocky and glancing to the side with cute, wet-looking beady eyes. ]
ATLAS
She/Her
hi, i'm atlas and i uh. really like fish, particularly extinct sea life, and i've been likened to the crying cat meme image way too many times- appearance-wise, at least. my TCP to start is a lot more simple, though...which is fine, because it gives me time to figure stuff out. i like being bulky and soft looking, and tend to gravitate to blues and yellows. having the ears on my TCP droop a little bit feels comfy to me, and i guess i couldn't resist the beady eyes. i wasn't exactly expecting to be first up, but i guess that's how the alphabet works ;_;
hope that does it good enough
![[Image: aux-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/aux-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall black TCP with distinctly neon pink eyes, posing as if ready to dance at any moment. ]
AUX
She/Her
i'm AUX and i am a split really centered around high school and stuff like our relationship to furry rave culture (many such cases with people our age, i know.) i like my name in all caps and i like blasting stupid music really loud. my TCP is not actually pitch black, but our reshade filter does that and i kind of like it? i plan on adding more neon accents as i go, but this kind of lanky look should be fun for putting funky clothes and accessories on. optimized towards renders or some shit
![[Image: beigebox-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/beigebox-1-1.png)
[image description: a large red TCP with ears fashioned into wedge-shaped horns, strolling along on a leisurely adventure. ]
BEIGE BOX
He/Him
i'm Beige Box, though just Beige works usually. my avatar here doesn't really convey why i'm called that, but it's meant to be a sort of dragon-like TCP with the limited part set i have to start with. my name comes from the term beige box- if you've seen those old 90's-early 2000's PCs, the ones that well, come in beige, that's a term frequently used. i resonate heavily with the old and sickly Dell PC we had growing up running Windows Me, and i'm hoping to build up this avatar with more features that remind me of my favorite custom desktop theme- where the "my computer" icon was a dragon.
![[Image: belugios-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/belugios-1-1.png)
[image description: a white TCP with large, batlike ears lounging exaggeratedly, unimpressed with this interview. ]
BELUGIOS
She/Her or He/Him depending on mood
i'm belugios, though belu will be fine in most cases- i only ask that you don't call me feminine terms unless you're como or from my own system, as the she/her moments are more of a fun occasionally femme dressup thing and i'd like to be seen as a man either way! i love horror and in particular vampire media and imagery, so my TCP is pale as hell and likely going to be decked out in gothic fashion. i should know, i've already made piles of it for SL and am glaring at the queue for this exercise so i can make her stop being fucking naked. goddamn tragic.
i also have a notorious lack of filter, so forgive me in advance for being crass. i can and will say the most awful things out of anyone here.
![[Image: blight-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/blight-1-1.png)
[image description: a thick, dull red TCP sitting down casually, yet looking exhausted ]
BLIGHT
She/Her
i haven't talked much to anyone in-system, so i guess this is an intro to them too. i'm blight, and i don't have a lot figured out yet, but i'd like to. my avatar looks a little rough around the edges from posture alone, and i'd like to make her feel...weathered, but dependable.
that's something i want for myself, too. someone people can rely on.
![[Image: bushnell-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/bushnell-1-1.png)
[image description: a stocky, brown TCP seemingly irritated at something off camera. ]
BUSHNELL
She/Her
i'm bushnell, one of the first to crawl out of the Mass and local weird carousel horse thing. i wanted my TCP to be big and bulky and able to throw down if needed- do no harm (probably) and take no shit type deal. i'd like to get some leather on her ASAP. funny that i'm going after blight, because i think we're going to get along, lol.
![[Image: capsule-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/capsule-1-1.png)
[image description: a dull pink TCP explaining something to someone off camera, and looking mildly tired of it. ]
CAPSULE
She/Her
wow three bitchy she/her mascs in a row. i'm capsule, and i'm the local doctor of the system, or however you'd put it. i definitely want to go into the medical horror angle, and make my TCP...very uncomfortable, in a way that makes Me comfortable. i have no idea if that makes sense, especially because she's just kind of a weird pinkish starting point. time to mesh a weird scalpel or something????
![[Image: cashmere-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/cashmere-1-1.png)
[image description: a square-ish red-brown TCP deep in thought, seemingly not noticing the camera. ]
CASHMERE
He/Him
i'm cash, though cashmere works okay too. i'm more private and reserved than a lot of the others, though i'd like to front more in general. staying inside all day feels weird and unpleasant, even if i'm nervous sometimes. i'll be honest, this avatar pulls a lot from my system form, at least in terms of ear placement and build when i'm not a mantis taur. i imagine the bug factor's going to increase from here.
![[Image: charade-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/charade-1-1.png)
[image description: a gangly white TCP contorting to seemingly push against the camera, overly curious as to what's on the other side. ]
CHARADE
It/Its
![[Image: tcp_smile_small.png]](https://homebrewdeviants.com/forum//images/smilies/tcp/tcp_smile_small.png)
[further poking for a response was not helpful]
![[Image: constellar-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/constellar-1-1.png)
[image description: a sleepy green TCP with large ears, distinctly camera-shy. ]
CONSTELLAR
He/Him
uhh
i don't really do good with the whole talking thing so you can call me constell if you want and my TCP is a bat Okay Bye i will do better blurbs next time
![[Image: counter-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/counter-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall, classy looking red TCP with an even, low gaze. she's definitely looking down on you.]
COUNTER
She/Her
i'm counter, and i plan on making my TCP elegant in a way that will make scapula specifically flustered. he's glaring at me for even saying this in public but it's fine! he'll have to deal with it.![[Image: tcp_evil_small.png]](https://homebrewdeviants.com/forum//images/smilies/tcp/tcp_evil_small.png)
![[Image: crush-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/crush-1-1.png)
[image description: a very small and chubby lime TCP, his eyespots pink and yellow and ears particularly nubbly. ]
CRUSH
He/Him
i'm crush and i am perpetually really Really anxious and panicky so i'll be quick too i guess! i like 2000's knicknacks and stationary and Lisa Frank style stuff, especially weird little green martians. kind of going for that here.
![[Image: curio-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/curio-1-1.png)
[image description: a large green TCP with an almost crest-like feature on his head, excitedly posing for the camera. ]
CURIO
He/Him
I'm Curio and I'm really happy to talk publicly for the first time! I don't front much at all, or haven't gotten to yet I guess, but I love dinosaurs, rocks, museums, the works! My memory ain't great post-Implosion on any of these topics, but i'm looking forward to researching more. My av is kind of going for a light-Parasauralophus thing, as that's my favorite dinosaur!
![[Image: fishbeaw-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/fishbeaw-1-1.png)
[image description: a large, soft looking seafoam TCP, glancing around peacefully. ]
FISHBEAW
He/Him
Hello! I'm "Fishbeaw", though none of us are really sure if that's going to stick. It has for a year, but who can say when I've barely been active. My name came from a plush Scapula made shortly after moved in, and never really went away. I like all things soft and nautical, and wanted to make a nice base for that kind of direction.
![[Image: fort-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/fort-1-1.png)
[image description: a thick red TCP, short and ready for adventure. ]
FORT
He/Him
iiii'm Fort! wow, i have not talked about myself at all publicly! this is really weird! i try to be warm and pleasant to be around in-system, and so far i've got pretty good reviews. i have no idea what an external life will look like for me, so i have a very simple starting point!
![[Image: hazard-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/hazard-1-1.png)
[image description: a wide, gentle looking teal TCP, unsure about facing the camera. ]
HAZARD
He/Him
hi, uh, this is my second time writing this blurb because my first one was kind of mean to myself. i'm scared of a lot of things, and depressed a lot of the times, but i'm looking forward to existing in this new way, for the most part. this big TCP makes me happy. thank you
![[Image: ivy-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/ivy-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall, muted purple TCP sneaking around and looking to its side. ]
IVY
He/It
i'm ivy and i am here and doing my best uh
tall lanky pale TCP i'm probably going to be in jeans yep okay
![[Image: noel-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/noel-1-1.png)
[image description: a simple brown TCP gazing out past the camera, his ears rotated into puppy-like folds. ]
NOEL
He/Him
i'm noel, i'm the only one out of all of our system members carrying a name over, but i think i'm still pretty shuffled over. i really like wintry, christmas aesthetics (wow who'd have guessed) and cozy colors and shapes. i have roughly turned my TCP into a dog and will be increasing that vibe ASAP. whoo
![[Image: nuzzle-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/nuzzle-1-1.png)
[image description: a massive pastel green TCP posing flamboyantly, welcoming in an almost overwhelmingly soft way. ]
NUZZLE
He/Him
i'm Nuzzle! i like to front when people need a helping hand around the house or just a reprieve from fronting, and love things like pastels, storybook illustrations, etc. griffins are my favorite animal, so i think it's safe to say i'm going for something big, soft, and somewhere in that direction.
![[Image: parker-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/parker-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall peach colored TCP, serenely pleased to be here. ]
PARKER
He/Him
hello, i'm Parker! i haven't had basically any time to chat with people, so i'll be very happy to make peoples' acquaintances. i'd like to make my TCP very spring-like and floral, with the delicacy of an old doll...
![[Image: pinprick-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/pinprick-1-1.png)
[image description: a short, fat brown TCP greeting the camera. ]
PINPRICK
She/Her
i'm an introject of our IRL pincushion and everyone is very perturbed by it, lol. i really like animal crossing and more specifically Sable Able, and am going for a short, squat, hedgehog-inclined base with this.
![[Image: rec-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/rec-1-1.png)
[image description: a blue TCP lounging on his back, his nametag unfortunately and suggestively positioned between his legs. ]
REC
He/Him
[no response could be taken aside from a mildly perturbing smile, sorry]
![[Image: remix-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/remix-1-1.png)
[image description: a tiny pitch black TCP with red eyes, looking curiously at the viewer. ]
REMIX
He/Him
i am Remix and i am happy to be hhere i do not know much about what to say but i like Spooky things and having fun with friends ok!!!
[for the sake of accuracy, please read this as a YTP style sentence mix.]
![[Image: scapula-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/scapula-1-1.png)
[image description: a simple blue TCP caught in a mid-sentence pose, and looking somewhat stressed about it. ]
SCAPULA
He/Him
i'm scapula, and i'm what many people in the system call """""the office boy"""""" (please do not call me this). i handle a lot of organizational stuff around here and am a bit of a perpetual workaholic and as cashmere puts it "an attitude balance patch" from my components pre-implosion. i try to be helpful, at least, and my TCP is fairly basic because i enjoy feeling "stock" at times. i do plan on making him a bit more varied, though, because it's a little bit too close to Perfect Worker, my main typeless TCP avatar.
![[Image: scaredy-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/scaredy-1-1.png)
[image description: a rather skittish looking purple TCP, his yellow eyes looking away nervously. ]
SCAREDY
He/Him
i'm Scaredy, local virtual pet and game hacking enthusiast. i don't really know what to do with myself in a lot of ways, though i'd be happy to return to my interests when i'm more comfortable with them- things got pretty dicey last year. i have a lot of memories from high school, and this purple was one i loved a lot, so that plus a yellow i associate with the Petz cat Scaredy works well. expression to match, of course.
![[Image: scrawl-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/scrawl-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall, elegant looking dull blue TCP, avoiding the camera and looking uncomfortable. ]
SCRAWL
She/Her
i don't like descriptions. i want to make some kind of dragon.
![[Image: shrapnel-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/shrapnel-1-1.png)
[image description: a miniscule pitch black TCP, white eyes and pink furrowed brows the only part of him visible outside of his angry posture.]
SHRAPNEL
He/Him
imagine this thing running at you in the dead of night and that's kind of what i'm going for. i have some TCP avatars already that go for like, my more literal appearance? so this is some kind of horrible new experiment. i want him to be awful.
![[Image: silky-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/silky-1-1.png)
[image description: a huge, fat pastel purple TCP, prancing around blissfully. ]
SILKY
It/Its
i'm silky and i like BIG guys and making things that could hug you to death and i like my TCP for that. it's really good at being big and hugging things to death!
![[Image: siren-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/siren-1-1.png)
[image description: a dark red-purple TCP with a large, fat stature and an unimpressed expression. her eyespots are distinctly pink. ]
SIREN
She/Her
not sure where to start. i don't really have a lot of conscious thought about where i was going with this, just feeling out what feels right. i guess that describes me a lot atm, aimless but doing my best.
![[Image: slyme-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/slyme-1-1.png)
[image description: a large, thick black TCP standing nonchalantly, tired and bored. ]
SLYME
He/They
[wild shrugging] it's just kind of a guy i liked making
![[Image: snapshot-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/snapshot-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall, white TCP, caught mid-walk and looking very startled. his worried eyespots have red lines underneath, almost akin to makeup. ]
SNAPSHOT
He/Him
i! worked really hard on the eyespots for this one. all of the eyespots in this exercise are made with the same kit, which i think is really cool and interesting, and after seeing people get creative i really wanted to see what i could do. that's the part that i worked hardest at. also, i'm snap, sorry.
![[Image: spectro-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/spectro-1-1.png)
[image description: a faceless blue TCP with her back mostly to the camera, short and nondescript. ]
SPECTRO
She/They
i don't really want to write much, but i did like making this. my name is spectro and i don't really know how to make friends, but it would be cool to someday, probably. i'm trying.
![[Image: squeaker-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/squeaker-1-1.png)
[image description: a short and squat red-brown TCP, standing defensively and looking frightfully to the side. ]
SQUEAKER
He/Him
i'm squeaker (PLEASE DO NOT SHORTEN THAT TO SQUEAK I DO NOT ENJOY IT) and i have a lot of mixed feelings about being cute and small and harmless but i guess this thing is going to be me exploring that safely and without the associations i usually have with my direct body. yeah.
![[Image: starlett-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/starlett-1-1.png)
[image description: a tall, white, stand-offish TCP, her expression irritated. ]
STARLETT
She/Her
i thought this exercise would be stupid and it wasn't. i actually put a lot of effort into this even if it's simple. i don't have a lot to say about myself but this thing is cool.
![[Image: taffy-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/taffy-1-1.png)
[image description: a somewhat shy, large blue TCP, sleepily looking away from the camera. ]
TAFFY WRAP
He/Him
why the fuck do i have to go near the bottom? now i'm all anxious, fucking christ. i'm taffy and i kind of have a weird contrast between having a cute and sleepy design, and, uh, the swearing tics a lot of us have. i'm a pretty big mess, but this TCP came out cool, and i like it. i want to put him in cool sweaters. and PJs.
![[Image: vinca-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/vinca-1-1.png)
[image description: a pure black TCP with white dot eyes, sitting politely and staring into the camera. ]
VINCA
They/It
It's wild to speak like this when I haven't been able to before. Sometimes all you need is a little prompting. I wonder if my pronouns will stay the same, but I'm happy to be here. I enjoy shadowy beings and this one works very well. Good for getting up to mischief!
![[Image: ward-1-1.png]](http://homebrewdeviants.com/static/story/implosion/ward-1-1.png)
[image description: a large, pale green TCP with a gaunt, lifeless expression, shambling around like a zombie. ]
WARD
He/It
my name starts with a W, no question about me going last. i showed up in the middle of an excruciating ER trip and the name stuck, but it doesn't bother me any. going for a zombie looking guy, to surprise of no one else in the system.
aaaand that's the current bunch. expect posts in between rounds of playing dressup to include renders, mini diary entries, idk! just having fun with this one.
comments and questions are also more than welcome- we're cool with answering inquiries on how this works for us as long as people are kind. besides, i'm sure it'd mean a lot for us to say hi to people as our full selves, not just "mortis".
AKA: The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known Post-Escaping The Mass
INTRODUCTION
[image description: a tall cartoon cat, known as a TCP, made out of slime and waving at the camera.]
hello to folks reading this both new and old to our situation- we're Mortis Velasquez, a plural person and one of the co-founders of the forums you're looking at as we speak. since this is going to be linked on socials and might be the first time people have engaged with our work, i'll try to keep the first part brief.
as of this post we are 29 years old, and have been an artist posting on the internet since we were 16. our first interactive project, Tiny Cat People: Void Session, is where we really got our start. it was hosted on TGchan and it was kind of. a point of stress.
...it still is. please do not ask us about that without us talking about it already lol.
with that project came the community and team us and our wonderful husband and co-founder Comorant brought together- Homebrew Deviants. we had been working on the universe of Morbit together since we were 13 year old roleplayers on Scratch, always hoping that someday we could make our characters and ideas into something other people could experience.
and now people do! and have for the past ten years, alongside a pile of really awesome friends both on HD staff and in the community itself. and for how much we've done re: worldbuilding and narrative projects, it's not bad for a decade.
it hasn't been easy, though. 2025 was our first real return to public posting after years of debilitating PTSD over social media and being a public figure under surveillance and exacerbated by life situation after life situation after life situation-
everything kind of congealed.
we knew ourselves as 100+ system members, which is a lot of guys. people never really got to know everyone, we never really got it all down, not in a way the people around us (or even ourselves) could even learn. as pressure was put on us from external factors, we found ourselves increasingly hard to tell who was who, and not in a good way.
we felt like we had lost our identity entirely. for months, particularly during a 6 month period of homelessness, we felt like we had become nothing but a mass of body parts and fragments, all lumped together in some kind of jellied Mass. existing in that state felt forced, like pressure outside of ourselves kept us
and of course, it couldn't hold. as we began to settle into our new permanent living situation, we got immediately and increasingly sick as parts began to crawl out of the mass, establishing themselves as individuals. made of the same components, the same chunks of organs, memories, etc- but largely put together "different".
due to how volatile it felt, how fast it onset, the only term that felt right was The Implosion.
what with everyone's memories, feelings, and associations being a patchwork disaster, we had to scramble to figure out who was who, how people felt about our life, each other, our friends and loved ones, our work- everything.
existential crisis doesn't really cover it.
it's been over a year since the Implosion, and we're still fucked up over it. social pressure to not have such a drastic change be so public- especially when a specific guy in here was known as the "face" and no longer is Despite The Fact We Keep Getting Called Him Anyway!!!!- kept us from really opening up.
what if people refused to learn the new roster?
what if people thought "eh, too complicated!"
what if people treated us worse than they did before?
would we even be able to exist in this new state as a known presence?
last summer, we started being a known presence again.
it went well. even with some pretty rough spots, it became clear that people did in fact want us around, and to experience our work- to get to know us. we ended up developing a lot stronger bonds with our friends, and getting a broader, more stable support network.
and yet we still struggled! even now, most people who we're most close to don't know who the hell is who outside of a few faces, which is the exact thing we want to avoid! god forbid, barely ANYONE knows outside of that immediate circle to begin with!
but then we came up with an idea.
in a lot of structured groups, especially things like group art therapy, participants are given a simple exercise with simple tools to help introduce themselves. we kept thinking too broadly- while everyone here has some kind of "form"/sona/whatever the hell you want to call it, the idea of explaining those is daunting and freaks some of us out. besides, stuff like second life avatars are a lot harder to pin down for 40 bespoke guys. it's too much pressure to get graphics and models and etc for!
but what if we were to give everyone the same basic tools in Second Life- the Basic Typeless TCP avatar pack, vanilla, no addons- and tell them to make some kind of self representation with that? everyone would be on the same playing field, and if asked to do a little writeup of their introduction and why they chose what they did...well, that'd be a pretty good baseline! and it'd be easy enough for new brainguys, too.
but, that's not a full picture, is it? that kind of thing takes time and self discovery, and never really ends as a process. how could we emulate that?
the nice benefit of Second Life is that avatars take on new parts and traits and pieces over time. you can put them together and adjust piecemeal, and our avatar systems we've designed have been optimized for that in particular.
why not go through the kits one at a time and let people choose what to add? what sort of things they want to try, like adding a new bit of clay or accent to their art therapy starting point? and, of course, they get to run around SL in that, or make art, renders, etc-
a way to be known. no one more important than anybody else.
we managed to get all of the starting avatars done up and rendered last night in 6 hours. this first post will introduce you to our system as it stands now, complete with the avatars we made. here we go.
LEVEL 1: BASIC BEGINNINGS
going in alphabetical order. let's go. assume everyone here is some weird degree of queer/genderfluid man unless otherwise specified.
[image description: a soft looking blue TCP, stocky and glancing to the side with cute, wet-looking beady eyes. ]
ATLAS
She/Her
hi, i'm atlas and i uh. really like fish, particularly extinct sea life, and i've been likened to the crying cat meme image way too many times- appearance-wise, at least. my TCP to start is a lot more simple, though...which is fine, because it gives me time to figure stuff out. i like being bulky and soft looking, and tend to gravitate to blues and yellows. having the ears on my TCP droop a little bit feels comfy to me, and i guess i couldn't resist the beady eyes. i wasn't exactly expecting to be first up, but i guess that's how the alphabet works ;_;
hope that does it good enough
[image description: a tall black TCP with distinctly neon pink eyes, posing as if ready to dance at any moment. ]
AUX
She/Her
i'm AUX and i am a split really centered around high school and stuff like our relationship to furry rave culture (many such cases with people our age, i know.) i like my name in all caps and i like blasting stupid music really loud. my TCP is not actually pitch black, but our reshade filter does that and i kind of like it? i plan on adding more neon accents as i go, but this kind of lanky look should be fun for putting funky clothes and accessories on. optimized towards renders or some shit
[image description: a large red TCP with ears fashioned into wedge-shaped horns, strolling along on a leisurely adventure. ]
BEIGE BOX
He/Him
i'm Beige Box, though just Beige works usually. my avatar here doesn't really convey why i'm called that, but it's meant to be a sort of dragon-like TCP with the limited part set i have to start with. my name comes from the term beige box- if you've seen those old 90's-early 2000's PCs, the ones that well, come in beige, that's a term frequently used. i resonate heavily with the old and sickly Dell PC we had growing up running Windows Me, and i'm hoping to build up this avatar with more features that remind me of my favorite custom desktop theme- where the "my computer" icon was a dragon.
[image description: a white TCP with large, batlike ears lounging exaggeratedly, unimpressed with this interview. ]
BELUGIOS
She/Her or He/Him depending on mood
i'm belugios, though belu will be fine in most cases- i only ask that you don't call me feminine terms unless you're como or from my own system, as the she/her moments are more of a fun occasionally femme dressup thing and i'd like to be seen as a man either way! i love horror and in particular vampire media and imagery, so my TCP is pale as hell and likely going to be decked out in gothic fashion. i should know, i've already made piles of it for SL and am glaring at the queue for this exercise so i can make her stop being fucking naked. goddamn tragic.
i also have a notorious lack of filter, so forgive me in advance for being crass. i can and will say the most awful things out of anyone here.
[image description: a thick, dull red TCP sitting down casually, yet looking exhausted ]
BLIGHT
She/Her
i haven't talked much to anyone in-system, so i guess this is an intro to them too. i'm blight, and i don't have a lot figured out yet, but i'd like to. my avatar looks a little rough around the edges from posture alone, and i'd like to make her feel...weathered, but dependable.
that's something i want for myself, too. someone people can rely on.
[image description: a stocky, brown TCP seemingly irritated at something off camera. ]
BUSHNELL
She/Her
i'm bushnell, one of the first to crawl out of the Mass and local weird carousel horse thing. i wanted my TCP to be big and bulky and able to throw down if needed- do no harm (probably) and take no shit type deal. i'd like to get some leather on her ASAP. funny that i'm going after blight, because i think we're going to get along, lol.
[image description: a dull pink TCP explaining something to someone off camera, and looking mildly tired of it. ]
CAPSULE
She/Her
wow three bitchy she/her mascs in a row. i'm capsule, and i'm the local doctor of the system, or however you'd put it. i definitely want to go into the medical horror angle, and make my TCP...very uncomfortable, in a way that makes Me comfortable. i have no idea if that makes sense, especially because she's just kind of a weird pinkish starting point. time to mesh a weird scalpel or something????
[image description: a square-ish red-brown TCP deep in thought, seemingly not noticing the camera. ]
CASHMERE
He/Him
i'm cash, though cashmere works okay too. i'm more private and reserved than a lot of the others, though i'd like to front more in general. staying inside all day feels weird and unpleasant, even if i'm nervous sometimes. i'll be honest, this avatar pulls a lot from my system form, at least in terms of ear placement and build when i'm not a mantis taur. i imagine the bug factor's going to increase from here.
[image description: a gangly white TCP contorting to seemingly push against the camera, overly curious as to what's on the other side. ]
CHARADE
It/Its
[further poking for a response was not helpful]
[image description: a sleepy green TCP with large ears, distinctly camera-shy. ]
CONSTELLAR
He/Him
uhh
i don't really do good with the whole talking thing so you can call me constell if you want and my TCP is a bat Okay Bye i will do better blurbs next time
[image description: a tall, classy looking red TCP with an even, low gaze. she's definitely looking down on you.]
COUNTER
She/Her
i'm counter, and i plan on making my TCP elegant in a way that will make scapula specifically flustered. he's glaring at me for even saying this in public but it's fine! he'll have to deal with it.
[image description: a very small and chubby lime TCP, his eyespots pink and yellow and ears particularly nubbly. ]
CRUSH
He/Him
i'm crush and i am perpetually really Really anxious and panicky so i'll be quick too i guess! i like 2000's knicknacks and stationary and Lisa Frank style stuff, especially weird little green martians. kind of going for that here.
[image description: a large green TCP with an almost crest-like feature on his head, excitedly posing for the camera. ]
CURIO
He/Him
I'm Curio and I'm really happy to talk publicly for the first time! I don't front much at all, or haven't gotten to yet I guess, but I love dinosaurs, rocks, museums, the works! My memory ain't great post-Implosion on any of these topics, but i'm looking forward to researching more. My av is kind of going for a light-Parasauralophus thing, as that's my favorite dinosaur!
[image description: a large, soft looking seafoam TCP, glancing around peacefully. ]
FISHBEAW
He/Him
Hello! I'm "Fishbeaw", though none of us are really sure if that's going to stick. It has for a year, but who can say when I've barely been active. My name came from a plush Scapula made shortly after moved in, and never really went away. I like all things soft and nautical, and wanted to make a nice base for that kind of direction.
[image description: a thick red TCP, short and ready for adventure. ]
FORT
He/Him
iiii'm Fort! wow, i have not talked about myself at all publicly! this is really weird! i try to be warm and pleasant to be around in-system, and so far i've got pretty good reviews. i have no idea what an external life will look like for me, so i have a very simple starting point!
[image description: a wide, gentle looking teal TCP, unsure about facing the camera. ]
HAZARD
He/Him
hi, uh, this is my second time writing this blurb because my first one was kind of mean to myself. i'm scared of a lot of things, and depressed a lot of the times, but i'm looking forward to existing in this new way, for the most part. this big TCP makes me happy. thank you
[image description: a tall, muted purple TCP sneaking around and looking to its side. ]
IVY
He/It
i'm ivy and i am here and doing my best uh
tall lanky pale TCP i'm probably going to be in jeans yep okay
[image description: a simple brown TCP gazing out past the camera, his ears rotated into puppy-like folds. ]
NOEL
He/Him
i'm noel, i'm the only one out of all of our system members carrying a name over, but i think i'm still pretty shuffled over. i really like wintry, christmas aesthetics (wow who'd have guessed) and cozy colors and shapes. i have roughly turned my TCP into a dog and will be increasing that vibe ASAP. whoo
[image description: a massive pastel green TCP posing flamboyantly, welcoming in an almost overwhelmingly soft way. ]
NUZZLE
He/Him
i'm Nuzzle! i like to front when people need a helping hand around the house or just a reprieve from fronting, and love things like pastels, storybook illustrations, etc. griffins are my favorite animal, so i think it's safe to say i'm going for something big, soft, and somewhere in that direction.
[image description: a tall peach colored TCP, serenely pleased to be here. ]
PARKER
He/Him
hello, i'm Parker! i haven't had basically any time to chat with people, so i'll be very happy to make peoples' acquaintances. i'd like to make my TCP very spring-like and floral, with the delicacy of an old doll...
[image description: a short, fat brown TCP greeting the camera. ]
PINPRICK
She/Her
i'm an introject of our IRL pincushion and everyone is very perturbed by it, lol. i really like animal crossing and more specifically Sable Able, and am going for a short, squat, hedgehog-inclined base with this.
[image description: a blue TCP lounging on his back, his nametag unfortunately and suggestively positioned between his legs. ]
REC
He/Him
[no response could be taken aside from a mildly perturbing smile, sorry]
[image description: a tiny pitch black TCP with red eyes, looking curiously at the viewer. ]
REMIX
He/Him
i am Remix and i am happy to be hhere i do not know much about what to say but i like Spooky things and having fun with friends ok!!!
[for the sake of accuracy, please read this as a YTP style sentence mix.]
[image description: a simple blue TCP caught in a mid-sentence pose, and looking somewhat stressed about it. ]
SCAPULA
He/Him
i'm scapula, and i'm what many people in the system call """""the office boy"""""" (please do not call me this). i handle a lot of organizational stuff around here and am a bit of a perpetual workaholic and as cashmere puts it "an attitude balance patch" from my components pre-implosion. i try to be helpful, at least, and my TCP is fairly basic because i enjoy feeling "stock" at times. i do plan on making him a bit more varied, though, because it's a little bit too close to Perfect Worker, my main typeless TCP avatar.
[image description: a rather skittish looking purple TCP, his yellow eyes looking away nervously. ]
SCAREDY
He/Him
i'm Scaredy, local virtual pet and game hacking enthusiast. i don't really know what to do with myself in a lot of ways, though i'd be happy to return to my interests when i'm more comfortable with them- things got pretty dicey last year. i have a lot of memories from high school, and this purple was one i loved a lot, so that plus a yellow i associate with the Petz cat Scaredy works well. expression to match, of course.
[image description: a tall, elegant looking dull blue TCP, avoiding the camera and looking uncomfortable. ]
SCRAWL
She/Her
i don't like descriptions. i want to make some kind of dragon.
[image description: a miniscule pitch black TCP, white eyes and pink furrowed brows the only part of him visible outside of his angry posture.]
SHRAPNEL
He/Him
imagine this thing running at you in the dead of night and that's kind of what i'm going for. i have some TCP avatars already that go for like, my more literal appearance? so this is some kind of horrible new experiment. i want him to be awful.
[image description: a huge, fat pastel purple TCP, prancing around blissfully. ]
SILKY
It/Its
i'm silky and i like BIG guys and making things that could hug you to death and i like my TCP for that. it's really good at being big and hugging things to death!
[image description: a dark red-purple TCP with a large, fat stature and an unimpressed expression. her eyespots are distinctly pink. ]
SIREN
She/Her
not sure where to start. i don't really have a lot of conscious thought about where i was going with this, just feeling out what feels right. i guess that describes me a lot atm, aimless but doing my best.
[image description: a large, thick black TCP standing nonchalantly, tired and bored. ]
SLYME
He/They
[wild shrugging] it's just kind of a guy i liked making
[image description: a tall, white TCP, caught mid-walk and looking very startled. his worried eyespots have red lines underneath, almost akin to makeup. ]
SNAPSHOT
He/Him
i! worked really hard on the eyespots for this one. all of the eyespots in this exercise are made with the same kit, which i think is really cool and interesting, and after seeing people get creative i really wanted to see what i could do. that's the part that i worked hardest at. also, i'm snap, sorry.
[image description: a faceless blue TCP with her back mostly to the camera, short and nondescript. ]
SPECTRO
She/They
i don't really want to write much, but i did like making this. my name is spectro and i don't really know how to make friends, but it would be cool to someday, probably. i'm trying.
[image description: a short and squat red-brown TCP, standing defensively and looking frightfully to the side. ]
SQUEAKER
He/Him
i'm squeaker (PLEASE DO NOT SHORTEN THAT TO SQUEAK I DO NOT ENJOY IT) and i have a lot of mixed feelings about being cute and small and harmless but i guess this thing is going to be me exploring that safely and without the associations i usually have with my direct body. yeah.
[image description: a tall, white, stand-offish TCP, her expression irritated. ]
STARLETT
She/Her
i thought this exercise would be stupid and it wasn't. i actually put a lot of effort into this even if it's simple. i don't have a lot to say about myself but this thing is cool.
[image description: a somewhat shy, large blue TCP, sleepily looking away from the camera. ]
TAFFY WRAP
He/Him
why the fuck do i have to go near the bottom? now i'm all anxious, fucking christ. i'm taffy and i kind of have a weird contrast between having a cute and sleepy design, and, uh, the swearing tics a lot of us have. i'm a pretty big mess, but this TCP came out cool, and i like it. i want to put him in cool sweaters. and PJs.
[image description: a pure black TCP with white dot eyes, sitting politely and staring into the camera. ]
VINCA
They/It
It's wild to speak like this when I haven't been able to before. Sometimes all you need is a little prompting. I wonder if my pronouns will stay the same, but I'm happy to be here. I enjoy shadowy beings and this one works very well. Good for getting up to mischief!
[image description: a large, pale green TCP with a gaunt, lifeless expression, shambling around like a zombie. ]
WARD
He/It
my name starts with a W, no question about me going last. i showed up in the middle of an excruciating ER trip and the name stuck, but it doesn't bother me any. going for a zombie looking guy, to surprise of no one else in the system.
aaaand that's the current bunch. expect posts in between rounds of playing dressup to include renders, mini diary entries, idk! just having fun with this one.
comments and questions are also more than welcome- we're cool with answering inquiries on how this works for us as long as people are kind. besides, i'm sure it'd mean a lot for us to say hi to people as our full selves, not just "mortis".
![[Image: TCP%20customs.png]](https://pile.randimg.net/3/13/190751/TCP%20customs.png)
