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[SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots
#77
Making Clownery a Comfort
Krowling Mortis + Benny Mortis, Post-Void Session
CW: Suggestive mentions
Raffle funded by AceofNothing

Numfi does an interview.
 



The talk show opens as it always does, zooming in over a live audience of TCPs until it reaches the stage, where Maurice Zap- everyone's favorite negativity type, a superstar to end all superstars- sits in an armchair with his hands in his lap, only shifting to wave at the crowd.

MAURICE: Welcome, welcome everyone!
MAURICE: What an awesome crowd today!
MAURICE: You know, we've got a special guest in store today.
MAURICE: I know there's been rumors going around for a while, and some of you may have figured it out in advance...
MAURICE: But we've got a survivor of the Spitkiller session here, on stage, for an exclusive interview!

 
The crowd goes absolutely ballistic- every TCP with connection to news, especially here in Taverne, was familiar with the session. While the name was a bit exaggerated- after all, Spit still lives and breathes-  it was the only time Spit had been damaged in person. Everyone knew the stories, though they were prone to urban legends and things going through the telephone gossip process...but it was a legendary event, and one that TCP culture embraced wholeheartedly. The actual session participants mostly kept their heads down, but...


MAURICE: She's an activist post-session, hard at work at making a real difference out there.
MAURICE: And what's crazy is- she's not even a TCP!
MAURICE: Introducing the advocate for the wizit species....Numfi, Mistress of the Twelve True Honks!


 
The crowd oohs in awe, Maurice letting them get it out of their system before a tall, TCP-scaled clown comes in from the back. Her robe nearly drags across the floor, but her tail wags as she walks over to the interviewee couch with a calm expression. She takes a moment to wave at the audience, people cheering.

Once they quiet down, she turns to face Maurice.


NUMFI: Such a nice crowd today!
MAURICE: Is it too much?
NUMFI: Not at all, I'm used to big groups.
NUMFI: Granted, not this big, but...
NUMFI: As we spread our influence, we're going to have to go to bigger gatherings.
MAURICE: Well, I'm just thrilled to give you that platform.

 
He turns to the camera, leaning back.


MAURICE: Now for our lovely audience- do you mind if I introduce you a bit more, or-
NUMFI: Be my guest.
MAURICE: Alrighty! So, Numfi here- she's part of a species called wizits.
MAURICE: It's rare for an actual sapient species to make their way out of a session.
MAURICE: But you- you chose to come out, right?
NUMFI: Mhm.
NUMFI: We were presented the option to go to Paradise or come to Morbit itself, and our population was pretty divided.
NUMFI: But the vast majority of wizits that were formally on the Void team, it just felt like the right option.
NUMFI: While our opinions vary heavily on Void themselves- it felt wrong to not be a part of the TCPs we worked with's lives.
MAURICE: And those opinions- I mean, surely it must be weird, especially from what I understand, you still live with Void?
NUMFI: It's a casual arrangement, but yes.
NUMFI: Void is a good god, I'd say- but they're still a god.
NUMFI: And there's just- there's that power dynamic.
MAURICE: Mhm, you can't get rid of that.
NUMFI: From what I understand, Morbitian TCPs have just as much varied opinions on Wax.
MAURICE: Oh, for sure. We all know how I feel about him!


 
The audience laughs, Numfi joining in.


NUMFI: I haven't had the opportunity to meet him personally, but...
MAURICE: Really? He was in your session!
NUMFI: Mhm, but he's busy. We actually do have a meeting planned soon to discuss citizenship with him...
MAURICE: Wow. That's incredible.
NUMFI: It's a big responsibility on my shoulders, talking to a high god.
NUMFI: But it's what needs to be done, and- can I be frank for a moment?
MAURICE: Please!
NUMFI: It's more...I see the session gods as people in power. Not...deities.
NUMFI: Visiting Wax for this is just as much an ordeal as going to file paperwork for housing.
MAURICE: Wow. It's like going to an office for you.
NUMFI: If you can believe it, yes.
NUMFI: It's just- they have power, but we've- we've been working for them, effectively, back in the session.
NUMFI: With Void, at least...they were respectful of our boundaries and our health, but unlike some of the TCPs- they weren't something holy to me.
NUMFI: And that's fine, you know? I don't mind either way.
MAURICE: That's incredible...
MAURICE: You're very generous to these gods!
NUMFI: It's a complicated thing!
NUMFI: But they have been kind to us, for the most part.
MAURICE: Mhmm, mhmmm...
MAURICE: Oh, and-
MAURICE: You're getting your magic type registered, right?
NUMFI: Oh, yes!
NUMFI: We're fairly certain that our magic system is teachable to non-wizits, so we want to get classes for that certified.
NUMFI: The few TCPs we've taught have been really successful. It's so rewarding...
MAURICE: Now, I don't know if it's safe, but...

 
He leans in, conspiratorially.


MAURICE: Can you show us a trick.

 
Numfi places her sleeved paw up to her chin, exaggerated in thinking it over as she goes "Hmmmm!". The audience can't help but giggle, and she waits for it to stop before nodding with a wide smile.


MAURICE: Alrighty, amazing! Let's see it!

 
The wizit closes her eyes, spreading her arms out-

-before making a rapid set of hand gestures, pressing her paws together for a moment. The audience is completely trained on her, Maurice's eyes widening....

She pulls her hands apart, and a little balloon dog pops into existence. Everyone gasps, and as she balances it on her hands and hands it to Maurice, their excitement turns to cheers when it moves, sniffing him.


MAURICE: Oh my god!
MAURICE: Is this- is it alive?
NUMFI: Sort of!
NUMFI: It's a magic trick that'll last for a few hours.
NUMFI: It's not- it's not really a construct, or sapient, I think the term is...
NUMFI: But it'll wander around as a toy.
MAURICE: That's incredible...I'm so sad that it'll fade eventually!
NUMFI: We've been practicing trying to make them last longer...but yes, wizit magic tends to be rather ephemeral.
NUMFI: It's a lot less "practical" than scrap magic in that sense.
NUMFI: Flashes of mirth and color, party tricks...
NUMFI: But there's value in that!
NUMFI: It's important for people to have a little fun, I think.
MAURICE: And- you used these tricks during the Spitkiller session, correct?
NUMFI: Oh, yes. Less of this one- though it did help Buddy cope with the post-surgery grief- and more of using popping balloons as a distraction tool.
NUMFI: If I do it right, they can be as loud as gunshots.
MAURICE: Wow. Now that's a party trick.
NUMFI: I wouldn't use that one now, I think...
NUMFI: Silently popping balloons are more my trade.
MAURICE: Much easier on the ears, I imagine...
MAURICE: And- is it true that every session wizit has their own powerset?
NUMFI: Mhm.
NUMFI: We're hoping to get those willing to volunteer their secrets to our magic schoolings.
NUMFI: Even with some opting out, it'll be a lot of stuff to work with.
MAURICE: Amazing. Just amazing.
MAURICE: And just- how many wizits are there?
MAURICE: I doubt people see them on the street often.

 
Numfi nods, thinking it over.


NUMFI: There were...a couple dozen in our session- about a hundred total, give or take.
NUMFI: People spread out a good bit, so, yes, you wouldn't be super likely to see them frequently.
NUMFI: But...we can reproduce. So in the next few years, I'd expect there to be a lot more around.
MAURICE: Wow. And it's magic?
NUMFI: Mhm.
MAURICE: And...


 
He leans in again.


MAURICE: You don't have to tell me this, but...
MAURICE: I've heard that TCP/wizit hybrids might be a thing down the line.
MAURICE: Is there any truth to this? The first TCP hybrids with another species?


 
Numfi gives the host a sly look as the crowd "oooh's" again.


NUMFI: Now that is a species secret.
NUMFI: Some things are meant just for us clowns!
NUMFI: We can have kids directly with another partner, yes...
NUMFI: But that's not the only way. And I can't tell you anything about it.
NUMFI: Sorry, Maurice!
MAURICE: It's fine, it's fine!
MAURICE: I'll just have to stay up at night wondering...such incredible stuff.
MAURICE: But, I do have to ask-
MAURICE: Would you ever date a complex?

 
Numfi laughs, rubbing her cheek.


NUMFI: I mean, maybe.
NUMFI: With our ability to size shift, it's very possible. More viable, you know?
NUMFI: But I feel like a TCP would get the session thing more.
NUMFI: It's like- it's like being a war veteran, in some senses.
MAURICE: I absolutely think it counts.
NUMFI: And- sessions are such a big part of TCP culture.
NUMFI: I feel like it's natural to want a relationship with someone who would get it better, even if they haven't been in a session themself.
MAURICE: I am right there with you. You need someone who gets it.
NUMFI: You do.
MAURICE: And...how's the relationship with the rest of the team?
NUMFI: Well, as you know- I'm currently staying with Void, as well as Buddy and Hark.
MAURICE: Wow...is living with Hark scary?
MAURICE: I mean, she was on the enemy team. It's already known that her and Buddy are, you know, a thing, but how do you feel about that?


 
The wizit shakes her head.


NUMFI: She doesn't scare me one bit- she's like family to me.
NUMFI: I hang out with her and Buddy all the time.
NUMFI: Every day, she's out there, being her best self- and I could never associate her with Spit after that.
NUMFI: It would be cruel!
MAURICE: So true...but I can't imagine it's easy.
NUMFI: You'd be surprised at how natural it feels.
NUMFI: With how she helped turn on Spit- it's like she's always meant to be on our side of things.
MAURICE: I see...that's incredible. Truly amazing.


 
They both pause to let the audience applaud, everyone completely engaged with the conversation. This kind of press hasn't been common for Spitkiller session survivors, aside from some of the TCPs going into similar activism...


Once everything calms down, Maurice makes a throat-clearing sound and continues.


MAURICE: Now, there's one more thing- possibly the biggest thing.
MAURICE: But for your activist movement- you're claiming to "make clownery a comfort", and really revise how people see the clown profession.
MAURICE: Especially here in Hoopla- that word's associated with gang violence!
MAURICE: But for you...
NUMFI: For us, Void instilled values based on the clowns from their world.
NUMFI: It's baked into us! Us wizits are hard wired to want to make people smile.
NUMFI: Our movement is to help spread those goals, and really show people the joy of making someone smile.
MAURICE: Wow...
NUMFI: It's really something special.
NUMFI: Like- it's about making people happy. Injecting joy into someone's life!
NUMFI: That's not to say physical comedy can't get slapstick-y.
NUMFI: Some wizits really prefer that sort of tangible humor over party tricks.
MAURICE: A pie to the face, I think I've heard?
NUMFI: Oh, yes. All about the pies.
NUMFI: But it's about that sense of consent. The feeling that everyone involved is happy.
NUMFI: We were...


 
She pauses, thinking over her words. Maurice lets her think it over, his attention rapt.


NUMFI: We were soldiers.
NUMFI: We were put into this situation- we were "born" into it.
NUMFI: We didn't have a choice, just like other session TCPs.
NUMFI: But we're here now, and we want to make a positive change.
NUMFI: Whether that's through making people feel a bit better about clowns, or teaching self defense through our techniques-
NUMFI: We really want to make the world a better place.

 
Maurice nods slowly, speaking almost as if he's choked up with tears.


MAURICE: You are a real hero, Numfi.
NUMFI: Oh, I don't need to be a hero...
NUMFI: I just want to be a clown.

 
The audience bursts into applause, Numfi giving them an appreciative smile.


MAURICE: Now- we're just about out of time.
MAURICE: But-
MAURICE: If everyone looks under their seats, you can find a free, complementary copy of Numfi's new book!
NUMFI: I hope you all like it- it's short, but I put all of my tips and tricks into it.
MAURICE: I'm sure they'll love it- and with any luck, it'll chart bestseller's in no time.
NUMFI: Now that would be a dream...
MAURICE: Well...

 
The negativity type reaches out his hand, and Numfi eagerly shakes it, nice and firm.


MAURICE: You have been an absolute treat, Numfi.
NUMFI: You too, Mr. Zap!
MAURICE: Please- call me Maurice.


 
He turns to the audience now, reclining in his chair and petting his little balloon dog.


MAURICE: With that, we'll go to commercials- and rememebr!
MAURICE: Always think of the positives!
[Image: TCP%20customs.png][Image: 2411]
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Messages In This Thread
[SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:21 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:22 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:24 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:27 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:28 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:29 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:34 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:37 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:41 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:44 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:47 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:52 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 03:54 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 04:00 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 11-20-2019, 04:02 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by knux400 - 11-20-2019, 10:56 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 11-25-2019, 07:12 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 12-02-2019, 08:20 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 12-05-2019, 11:44 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 12-15-2019, 11:39 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 12-17-2019, 12:35 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 12-19-2019, 10:48 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 12-20-2019, 07:47 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 12-24-2019, 06:13 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 12-27-2019, 12:24 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 01-08-2020, 12:17 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 01-14-2020, 09:59 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by Zenthis - 01-24-2020, 09:12 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 01-27-2020, 08:08 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 03-05-2020, 10:46 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 03-07-2020, 12:26 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 03-15-2020, 07:40 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 03-18-2020, 12:24 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 03-21-2020, 11:11 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 03-22-2020, 07:39 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 03-27-2020, 08:52 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 03-31-2020, 05:10 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by Zenthis - 04-01-2020, 08:22 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 04-01-2020, 08:54 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by Zenthis - 04-03-2020, 06:08 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 04-12-2020, 06:55 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by A_Mi_Manera - 04-26-2020, 06:36 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 04-30-2020, 05:48 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 06-01-2020, 02:32 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 06-08-2020, 09:49 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 07-15-2020, 10:35 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by knux400 - 08-13-2020, 08:54 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 06-09-2021, 07:44 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by SHIVERS - 12-24-2021, 02:51 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 01-26-2024, 10:44 PM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 02-12-2024, 02:30 AM
RE: [SIDESTORY] Morbit Oneshots - by skinstealer - 03-08-2024, 10:48 PM

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