[PCA] REMEDY HOUR

[skinstealer]

 [id: an image of maes resting their head on charon's lap, wearing one of the headset pieces for their therapy sessions. imagery and color palette work reminiscent of maybequest, using black, white, red, and an elevator door, looms behind them.]

 
MAES: ...Good afternoon.
 

Maes takes a seat on Papaya's couch, their posture straight.

PAPAYA: Afternoon doctor, you managing alright after last session?
PAPAYA: First time doing therapy according to your records.
MAES: It..went surprisingly well.
MAES: I didn't experience much in the way of flashbacks, and I was able to come out to Synna- my other close friend.
 

They turn to Charon for a moment, giving him a slight smile. Charon gives a pat on the shoulder in return, nice and gentle.

MAES: Judgment helped me through it, but she took it very well.
MAES: ...said she expected as much, really.
 

The construct’s voice carries a smile.

PAPAYA: Good to hear, I'm glad that worked out.
PAPAYA: Usually it takes a little longer than one session to get a result like this, you know?
PAPAYA: Be proud.
MAES: I'm guessing it won't be as easy going forward, though.
MAES: I see that last session as a test run, considering I didn't even delve into my history with things…
 

Here goes…

MAES: But today I'd like to try.
PAPAYA: Wonderful to hear!
PAPAYA: Do you have anything in mind?
MAES: I should probably start at the beginning, correct?
MAES: I know you've done some digging, but...
MAES: I'd rather you hear the story from my mouth.
PAPAYA: I'd prefer that honestly, if you don't mind.
MAES: ...let me think of where to start, then.
 

It’s fine. It’s going to be fine.
I can do this.

They visibly tense up, trying to collect themself.

I-
I’m scared-
It’s going to be fine, Charon’s here-

MAES: ...may I request something strange?
PAPAYA: Go ahead.
MAES: Can I rest my head on Judgment's lap, for this?
MAES: It's...something we do in our own time, when we're talking over things like this.
PAPAYA: Never seen this before but... worth a shot I suppose.
PAPAYA: He'll be applying the headset today as well, yes?
CHARON: Mm, it'd be easier that way for the Boss.
MAES: It's appreciated...I struggle with people touching my hair.
 

They scoot over, making room for Charon to sit with them. He doesn’t hesitate to get into position, giving Maes enough space to lay down.

They slowly ease onto his lap, giving him another grateful smile.

MAES: Thank you.
MAES: He's joked that he'll be my therapy dog before, so I may as well take him up on the offer.
 

Charon smiles right back, Papaya unable to help themself from laughing a little.

PAPAYA: I have a friend who's a literal therapist dog, so not the first time I've heard that from someone.
MAES: You can pass the headset over, then...I'll try to relax.
 

Payapa hands the piece over to Charon, the dog proceeding to apply the adhesive gently.

CHARON: Got you, Boss.
 

The room feels a little heavier than last session, the air conditioning harsh and the ambience colder.

Maes bristles at the sudden temperature change, but doesn't object.

It’s a few moments before they speak.

MAES: ...my mother was...simply put, a cultist.
MAES: I know you're from out of region, so I'm not sure how familiar you are with the greater god Spit, and her "religion".
MAES: She’s a greater god, focused on violence and vices…
MAES: Her entire zone controlled as a fascist state under her immortal rule.
MAES: My mother went beyond just following, though- she was high ranked in the cult, one of Spit's two demons, even...and the one held in high esteem.
MAES: Spit gave her all the money she wanted to build this place, and in turn, she started the Devil's Advocacy project.
 

In response to that, there’s the sudden sound of large vats and tubes bubbling in the room, surrounding the three of them. Indistinguishable chatter echoes against the walls, reminiscent of discussion between staff.

PAPAYA: The project that...?
MAES: The project that created the residents you'll be treating, yes.
MAES: ...and myself.
PAPAYA: What was her treatment of people like during this?
PAPAYA: Your experiences and others.
MAES: That's...
 

They have to steel themself, struggling to find the words.

MAES: It was different for me and my two close siblings than the others.
MAES: The three of us were considered "candidates"- selected for the project's success.
MAES: We were to be Spit’s future demons, should we succeed.
MAES: Engineered to be just what she wanted.
MAES: The perfect servants.
 

The words stick in Maes’ throat.

MAES: Everyone else was considered a reject, and was either culled right away, or stuck waiting for their number to come up, either years down the line or after being put through horrible tests and fights to the death against each other.
MAES: ...I'm sorry, I know this is a lot.
PAPAYA: I was able to find out a little bit of this from asking around, I just hoped it wasn't as awful as it sounded.
MAES: It's...probably worse.
MAES: For the safety of the residents, I've been trying to keep information limited.
MAES: ...We want to go public, at some point.
MAES: We have documents to back up all of our claims, as well as the names and addresses of all of the contacts involved in the project.
MAES: It's my best shot at justice, but...
MAES: I want the residents to have some time to prepare for that.
MAES: For being under a spotlight.
PAPAYA: Mm.. I can understand.
PAPAYA: From what it seems, plenty of people have never even been outside before.
MAES: Almost all of them, in fact.
MAES: I only just recently, within the past few months, ventured out of the lab myself.
MAES: It's a terrifying prospect for some, though many are enthusiastic about trying when they're further along in their recovery.
PAPAYA: What was it like for you finally going outside?
 

The room begins to shift slightly, the sensation of sunlight felt on Maes’ skin. The warm and gentle air is unlike anything within the usual confines of the lab, something still new to them.

MAES: ...Judgment and I went on a date.
MAES: He took me clothes shopping- we picked out things for both of us.
MAES: Before then, I would wear the same thing, every day...but he encouraged me to branch out, and helped me pick out colors that I knew I'd like.
MAES: We went out to eat, after...my first time eating at a restaurant.
MAES: We'd ordered in before, but it was so new, being around other people like that.
MAES: I wasn't recognized, or if I was, no one said anything.
MAES: It was like...I was just another person.
 

The ambiance of being at a shopping center in the evening fills the room. Light sounds of crowds enjoying themselves and the smell of a food court, pleasant to Maes’ ears.

PAPAYA: And now you're hoping to give the others the chance of that too, to have their time to enjoy the surface.
MAES: That's the goal, yes...
 

They pause for a moment.

MAES: That was the first time Judgment and I talked about gender, too.
MAES: In that restaurant.
PAPAYA: What prompted it?
MAES: It came up during the clothes shopping, but I held off until then to actually talk about it.
MAES: ...my brother, Mason....he was trans, knew it even from a very young age.
MAES: Absolutely hated being called a girl, being dressed up in the clothes our mother picked out...I wanted to go into that, even if I hadn't figured out my own situation yet.
PAPAYA: Right.
PAPAYA: I'm guessing you found a good opportunity to change things up?
MAES: It's hard to say how much my change of clothes weighed in on my gender in that moment, but...
MAES: It felt like...
MAES: I don't know.
MAES:  When I figured out my pronouns and started dressing in ways that made me feel better about the way I present myself, it was like-
MAES: I thought Mason and Melanie would be proud of me.
PAPAYA: You're free from that now, you get to make the choices in your life you couldn't before.
MAES: ...I wish they got the option to.
PAPAYA: Mm....
 

Papaya pauses to think of how to continue from there.

PAPAYA: Were you three pretty close?
PAPAYA: Sounds like it.
MAES: As much as we could be.
MAES: We were supposed to be competing against each other, but none of us wanted to.
MAES: We just wanted to be friends.
PAPAYA: Mm... your mother made you compete?
MAES: Often...we were also put through our own individualized tests, and those varied based on our mutations.
MAES: For Mel, it was regeneration, for me, it was poison digestion, for Mason...
 

They grimace.

MAES: His body would overproduce internal fluid, most often in response to injury.
MAES: His tests revolved around testing what caused that excess blood production.
PAPAYA: ...Is this topic getting too heavy for you right now?
PAPAYA: I think it's worth diving into but I don't want to push you harder than you're ready for.
MAES: No, I'm...I've been thinking a lot about them lately...especially Mason, considering the gender thing.
PAPAYA: Then continue?
MAES: ...Mason was picked on a lot, by our mother.
MAES: The fact that he refused to be called her daughter pissed her off more than almost anything, and even with him so young...she treated him like a criminal.
MAES: He only lived to be around five years old.
MAES: Nearly six, if a few more months passed.
MAES: Not even enough time to really figure himself out, or to have any life experiences outside of being punished.
MAES: Maybe it's...I don't know, maybe it's disrespectful to think that me going forward with this is paying him any kind of tribute, but that comes to mind, sometimes.
PAPAYA: I think you're fair to call it tribute.
PAPAYA: As hard as it is to think of it, living life for someone who isn't there anymore is its own value.
MAES: Thank you...
PAPAYA: There's a lot in you still being here after all that, don't ever downplay yourself.
MAES: Mm…
 

They let themself rest their head in Charon's lap for a few moments, taking some time to breathe.

Charon: Take your time, you’ve got this.
MAES: Thank you…
 

They turn to Papaya again.

MAES: ...may I talk a little bit more about that?
MAES: About what happened to him?
PAPAYA: Mmhmm.
PAPAYA: At your pace.    
 

The comfort of the mall fizzles away as the room twists homeward, back to the labs. The familiarity of old bedrooms and childhood belongings on the floor contrasted against the daunting nature of the twisted chambers where experiments were held.

MAES: The last day we had together was out of the ordinary- in every possible way.
MAES: There was an escape attempt by a maybecat and some of the staff, and they managed to find Melanie.
MAES: With her being as sweet as she was, there was no question that they'd try to rescue her- but she wouldn't go without Mason and I.
PAPAYA: ...What happened from there?
MAES: They found us and broke us out of our tests.
MAES: Mason and I didn't need any convincing, and even though we both loved our mother- we knew that things were getting bad.
MAES: Melanie was less aware of anything that was going on, there...but she also knew that Mason especially needed to get out.
MAES: We headed out.
MAES: The group protected us even during a horrible fight with Spit's other demon, and it looked like we were going to actually get out.
PAPAYA: What stopped it?
MAES: When we got to the elevator going up to the surface-
MAES: Our mother found us, and hijacked the controls.
MAES: She told us that she was going to take Melanie and I back- and leave Mason for dead.
MAES: Nearly crashed the elevator in order to disorient people, got the two of us back, and let the thing fall the rest of the way.
MAES: A day later, she told us the lot of them had been eaten by the horrors in the pit they crashed into.
PAPAYA: The elevator goes that deep?
MAES: That one did, yes.
MAES: With it crashed...there's no way they could have gotten out.
MAES: I may have never seen a body, but there's logistically no way.
PAPAYA: I'm sorry.
MAES: It's...
 

Their voice stops in their throat before they can get out an "okay".

PAPAYA: Out of curiosity, do you blame yourself at all for it?
MAES: ...no.
MAES: I know whose fault it was.
MAES: I was five years old as well, I couldn't have done a thing to stop it.
MAES: But that makes it worse, honestly.
PAPAYA: Mm... at that age it becomes a formative memory.
MAES: Not only that, but the cruelty and unfairness of it all overwhelms me.
PAPAYA: There's certainly guilt left over from surviving as much as you did, I think.
PAPAYA: It's clear you take a lot of the workload because you're trying to help others heal.. but it's good to remember to let yourself recover too.
MAES: ...that's very true, yes.
MAES: Being the only survivor of the three of us, and even just...
MAES: ...there were over twenty thousand maybecats made in this project.
MAES: 60 years, twenty thousand lives.
MAES: We only have two hundred residents left.
PAPAYA: I hope that I can prove myself a worthy contributor.
PAPAYA: I think everyone deserves better than what they've been handed.
 

That seems to snap them out of their potential spiral, the karacel nodding.

MAES: I think so too.
MAES: Having you here does help the worry- you've been handling this kind of information better than I expected.
PAPAYA: I've... been through plenty myself, not to derail your session.
PAPAYA: Took this job because I wanted to see people who shared that trauma find their way.
MAES: I think I'm reaching my limits for today anyway...
PAPAYA: Want to start the deescalation?
MAES: Yes, please.
 

The environment restores to its neutral state, slowly but surely. A final hiss can be heard as it reverts back into a giant blank.

PAPAYA: I'm impressed with much you were willing to talk about today, had clients who've taken me years to finally open up that much.
MAES: ...to be blunt, this is just the surface of what we're getting into, Papaya.
MAES: While this isn't insignificant to me, we have a lot more to cover and a lot of it gets worse from here.
PAPAYA: Then I'll just have to continue to put in only my best, no?
MAES: If you want to see the other residents, you better.
 

The slightest smile twitches at the corner of their lips, something Papaya hopefully returns.

PAPAYA: Get some rest tonight, you and Judgment should find something nice to do to cool off together.
PAPAYA: I have ideas for our next session and preparations to make.
MAES: Thank you. Again.
 

They slowly sit up, stretching out.

MAES: And thank you, Judgment, for being a good therapy dog.
CHARON: Glad to be of service.
CHARON: Shall we head out?
MAES: Mm. I want to head home...
 

They take Charon's arm in one of their own, expanding their white cane in the other.

MAES: Have a good rest of your day, Papaya.
PAPAYA: The same to you, doctor, see you soon.